Through Your Eyes
by Thera90
Summary: KyoHaru Kyo and Haru never seem to get along, all they do is argue or fight. But how will their relationship change when a strange occurrence causes them to switch bodies? Will they grow to understand each other or will it only make things worse?
1. Chapter 1

**Through Your Eyes **

**Summary: **(Kyo/Haru) Kyo and Haru never seem to get along, all they do is argue or fight. But how will their relationship change when a strange occurrence causes them to switch bodies?! Will they grow to understand each other or will it only make things worse? And more importantly, can they find a way to switch back?

**Rating: **M

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Fruits Basket or any of the characters.

**Setting: **during the anime

* * *

**Chapter 1**

"Oi! Quit staring off into space and hurry the hell up, you DUMB COW!" Kyo Sohma shouted to Haru as he waited after school with Tohru and Yuki for the boy to join them.

Haru Sohma, who had been standing motionless on the other side of the hallway, snapped his head up, eyes flashing. "WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?"

"Finally, a reaction! You heard me, you _dumb cow_, now get a move on." Kyo insisted impatiently.

"You…. looking for a fight?" Black Haru growled.

"Please, I have better things to do –."

"You just want to start another fight 'cos you want to look good in front of Tohru if you defeat me, don't you?" Haru sneered, well and truly Black now.

Kyo growled. _Why does the baka always have to bring her into this? _

"You're not going to accept my challenge you weak little kitten? If you were a man –"

As usual, just like it hadn't taken much for Kyo to bring out Black Haru, it hadn't taken long for Haru to make Kyo snap. He lunged at the ox roaring, "Bring it on anytime!"

Standing a safe distance away, Yuki rolled his eyes. "Here we go again."

"Ah…s-shouldn't we stop them?" Tohru stammered.

Yuki simply sighed, looking at his watch impatiently.

------------------------

_That stupid cow, _Kyo thought as he dodged Haru's fist and sent a punch back. _Why can't he learn to control himself? If you ask me, this ' black side' thing he has going on is just a well-mastered act to use as an excuse to cause destruction and get away with it! Bah! Could he be any more pathetic?_

Haru sneered as he attacked Kyo, a spew of insults spilling from his mouth that he knew would keep the boy fired and fighting. _So immature… _he thought, grinning as he managed to block a number of Kyo's attacks in quick succession. _He spends so much time training just to defeat Yuki. It's like that's all that matters in his dumb life. What a baka. _

The cat and the ox were so involved in their fight that neither noticed as one of Yuki's fan girls approached him, speaking quickly before leaving in giggling flutter, nor did they hear a word Yuki discussed with Tohru afterwards.

"Ano…Kyo – kun?" Tohru called.

The sound of her voice made him stop and look her way, and Haru used this distraction to his advantage. In the next instance a Kyo found himself flying through the air from the force of Haru's blow.

Haru laughed madly then abruptly reverted to 'White Haru' as Kyo hit the floor, skidded along on his back and came to a rest at Tohru and Yuki's feet.

Tohru gasped. "Kyo-kun are you okay?!"

"I'm fine…" Kyo grumbled, blushing. "Why were we waiting for that stupid cow boy anyways?"

"Tohru invited me over for dinner." Haru said in a bored voice.

"I was just informed of some matters I must stay back and attend to." Yuki said. "Honda-san offered to help me, so Kyo, you and Haru head off and we'll meet you at Shigure's later."

-----------------

"Why is it that I always get stuck walking home _alone _with you?" Kyo grumbled. "As if that fact isn't bad enough, I have to keep a constant eye on you just to make sure you don't wander off in the wrong direction without even realising it."

"Actually Kyo," Haru looked straight at him, "this would be the first time _me _and _you _have walked home…_alone… together_." He smirked, knowing the stresses on certain words would both annoy and disturb the neko.

_Why is he saying it like that?_ Kyo thought furiously._ Is he trying to start another fight? I really don't feel like dealing with Black Haru…he's so unpredictable. I don't understand that octopus head at all. _

"Well one time is one time too many." Kyo snapped, making a huffing noise and turning his head away.

He sighed, staring at the ground as he took each determined step, trying not to look back at Haru. After a few moments however he had to look up to make sure Haru was still following him. He saw the ox, also gazing at the ground, completely lost in his own little world, heading off the path and into the woods.

_Typical! _Kyo thought in annoyance, opening his mouth to shout at the other boy, but before he could he spied a blur of movement ahead. Alarm shot through him as he realised it was a girl, running, looking intently down at something that she clutched in her hands and not paying attention to where she was going – she was heading straight in Haru's direction!

If neither of them looked up soon they would collide.

_Oh no! I can't let her see him transform! _Kyo lunged towards Haru frantically, intent on pushing the absent minded boy out of the way. Unfortunately his timing was a little off, and instead of pushing Haru out of the way, he ended up reaching him at the same time as the girl.

All three smashed into each other.

"(!$&!&#(#&&(!"

They fell in a heap to the ground; the small bottle the girl had been carrying so carefully flying high into the air, spilling a sparkling silvery-blue liquid over the two boys. It evaporated the moment it touched them and left a fine, shimmering dust, which seemed to cling to their skin. Kyo sneezed as he attempted to brush the strange stuff off him while Haru blinked, trying to remove particles from his eyes.

When Kyo looked up he was astonished to see the girl had disappeared. "Hey! Where did she go?"

"More importantly, why didn't we transform?" Haru asked.

"I guess we were just lucky this time," Kyo alleged. "But how dumb can you get? You should really pay more attention to your surroundings you big, stupid, fat, DUMB cow!"

Haru growled low in his throat, eyes flashing. "What did you just call me?" He whispered with menace before attacking Kyo. "I'm not dumb!"

Kyo mentally groaned. _I'm not dumb? What is he, a five year old? Crap, how come I always seem to bring out Black Haru so quickly? That baka really needs to learn how to control himself…_

----------------

_Much _later, Kyo and Haru finally arrived at Shigure's house. Shigure greeted them at the door noticing their completely battered appearances.

"I see you two couldn't keep your hands off each other, could you?" Shigure teased. "Ah the vigour of youth!"

"SHUT UP!" Kyo screamed.

"You would think with all the _practice _I kindly provide you with, you would have defeated Yuki by now, Kyo." Haru piped up, unaffected by Shigure's comment. "It's shameful really."

"Fighting someone as unskilled as you is NOT considered practice!" Kyo yelled. "AND I WILL BEAT THAT DAMN RAT, JUST YOU WAIT AND SEE! IT WON'T BE LONG NOW!" He stormed off to shower.

Once in the bathroom, Kyo looked at himself. _Where did all that strange dust go?_ he wondered. _I was absolutely covered in it; surely it couldn't have all fallen off? _

It was almost as if it had simply soaked into his skin…

----------------

Kyo turned off the water and stepped out of the shower, reaching for a towel but was distracted by the sound of the door creaking open...

Haru poked his head in and was rewarded with the lovely sight of Kyo, fresh from the shower, hair sexily mussed up, tanned skin slippery, wet and glistening, one droplet of water sliding down his chest, over his tight abs and down –

"YOU PERVERT!" Kyo screeched.

Haru blinked, his face blank. "Honda asked me to tell you that dinner is ready."

Unable to stop the flaming blush that was spreading rapidly over his face, Kyo grabbed his towel and slammed the door.

A few minutes later he was dressed. As he exited the room, he was alerted by a sound from the other end of the hallway. Looking up he saw Haru, opening a door and poking his head inside.

"Nope, that's not the right one." Haru said to himself and meandered over to see what the next door held in store.

Kyo rolled his eyes. _I can't imagine being so dumb I actually get lost in a house, and one I've visited so often at that. _Muttering to himself, he walked briskly over to the ox, grabbed his arm and dragged him in the correct direction.

-------------------

"Aww! How nice, now their holding hands!" Shigure chirped as Kyo and Haru arrived at the table. "Kyo and Haru realised their burning desire for each other this afternoon," he informed Tohru cheerfully.

"Huh?" she looked baffled.

"WHAT?!?!" Kyo yanked his hand off Haru's arm. "I WAS NOT HOLDING HIS HAND!"

Shigure laughed merrily.

Yuki sighed, putting his head in his hands.

"Yuki." Haru said, going to the rat's side at once. "Are you okay? Do you feel unwell?"

"Mm. Yeah. It's just a bit noisy..."

"Kyo. Shut up." Haru ordered.

Kyo twitched. "Don't tell me what to do!" But he sat down quietly anyway.

The neko chewed angrily at his food as he glared across the table. _It really pisses me off when that cow comes over, _he thought. He hated having to watch little love hearts practically pop into that dumb cow's eyes every time he glanced Yuki's way. Today for some reason, witnessing this spectacle seemed to be pissing him off to a greater extent than usual.

His thoughts were shredded as a sudden almost violently dizzying feeling rushed through him. _What was that? _Kyo shook his head slightly, trying to clear it. _Maybe I'm just tired… _

He excused himself from the table, and stumbled up the stairs feeling more and more dizzy with each step so that by the time he reached the top he was reduced to crawling.

_I just need a little lie down then I'll feel much better… _he tried to reassure himself.

Meanwhile Haru was experiencing a similar feeling.

"Gomen nasai." He apologised to the others. "I'm feeling slightly unwell all of a sudden. I think I should call Hatori so I can go home and lie down as soon as possible."

"AHH!" Tohru cried as Shigure went to call Hatori. "Was it my cooking?!"

-----------------

Kyo blinked blearily as the sun shone through the window the following morning. He sighed heavily, _Damn…school…wonder why my alarm clock hasn't gone off yet…_he reached over to the table by the bed to switch it off, not wanting its piercing alarm to sound and abuse his eardrums unnecessarily.

Where was it? Not where it normally was. He moved his hand, blindly trying to find the clock. His fingers brushed against an object he didn't recognise in his room. Something smooth, cool, hard… He opened his eyes to see what it was. It was a shiny, metal chain and it looked suspiciously like something that Ha-

Kyo leaned closer; it was so shiny that he could see his reflection –

He froze as he looked into it and realised the reflection was not his. He slowly turned around to check behind him.

No one was there. Even slower now, he turned back to look at 'his' reflection and blinked rapidly. The face of Hatsuharu Sohma blinked back at him.

* * *

_Okay, that ending sounded a bit weird I think…it's a weird idea but hopefully it will work out so please review and tell me what you think :)_


	2. Chapter 2

_Thankyou Mr.Wuggles and Mystery 100 for your reviews :)_

**

* * *

****Chapter 2**

Kyo laughed softly and looked around. "This isn't my room."

He got up and walked to a door, opening it into a bathroom. He looked at himself in the mirror unblinking. "How strange, I seem to have become Haru overnight…"

His voice, which was actually Haru's voice, came out calmly, although his thoughts were anything but.

_Ahhh! Why am I so calm? __How is this possible? I feel so freaked out and yet I can't seem to panic about this. Could it really be just a dream? _

Kyo slapped himself, hard.

_Ow._

"Okay, I'm beginning to think this is _not _a dream." And somehow something in his mind had never thought it was. Somehow, part of him _knew _that strange and unexplainable as this situation may be, it was also all too horrifyingly real…

"Haru!" another door burst open to reveal Momiji's cheerful face. "Oh, Haru! You're up early; I thought I was going to have to drag you out of bed like I do most days."

"Momiji!" Kyo burst out. "I'm not Haru, I'm Kyo."

Momiji looked at him blankly.

"I'm serious!" Kyo insisted. _God dammit, how am I going to make him believe me when I can't even sound worried about it?_

"Momiji, I went to sleep in my body last night, and then when I woke up this morning I found myself in Haru's room, in his body!"

He was struck by a disturbing thought. _Oh god, does this mean that Haru is in MY body? _

"Ha, ha, ha! Haru you're so funny." Momiji burst into giggles and thew his arms around the taller boy, hugging him.

_Ahh! Get of me you little brat! _Kyo screamed in his mind, but he couldn't seem to say it out loud, nor could he move his arms to push the bunny off him. What was even stranger was the sudden flood of affection he felt towards the shorter boy. _Since when did I ever even not find Momiji annoying? Let alone have any affection for him! _

Kyo took as deep a breath as he could manage through Momiji's strangling hug and tried to think as calmly as he appeared to be. What was the last thing he had been doing before he woke up like this?

_I felt dizzy and I went to bed… _

His eye's widened as he remembered the strange incident of the previous afternoon. _That dust that fell on me when that strange girl bumped into us the other day…could it be somehow responsible for this??_

------------------

Kyo – in - Haru's body followed Momiji to school, planning to find Haru – in- his body and find a way to switch back before this whole thing became anymore disturbing! He had given up on the idea of trying to make Momiji believe that he really wasn't Haru, he wouldn't believe it himself if it wasn't happening to him.

Part of him knew if he kept on going on about it out loud, naturally Momiji (as crazy as the rabbit himself was) would think Haru had gone insane and he would tell other people, and they would most surely agree. As more people started to think he was insane he might lose awareness of his instincts and start believing he had lost his mind too and then he would never be able to set things straight again….

_Ow. _This was making his head hurt._ Okay, perhaps too much thinking is only making this worse. Perhaps I should stop chasing my thoughts around in circles in my mind when I'm in this state. _

But of course, trying not to think only made one think more.

_Isn't it bad enough I'm already cursed without having to have other weirdo mystical shit happening to me? _

He mentally sighed in annoyance as he watched Momiji skip ahead of him, whistling a jaunty tune._ Is he ever not hyper? _Kyo thought, feeling the urge to hit the smaller boy in an attempt to shut him up. But, at the same time as these thoughts crossed his mind he continued to feel the strange warmth of affection and a deep fondness towards the rabbit.

A feeling of wanting to protect him.

_It's almost as if I'm feeling what Haru would feel towards Momiji…_Kyo slowly realised, _and while I can think my own thoughts, I can hardly say or do anything that is out of character with what Haru would do! _

--------------------------

"See you later!" Momiji waved as he headed off to his class.

Kyo sighed, he had no idea where Haru's class was, but he did know where his own was. Hoping that Haru, if he was in Kyo's own body had gone to class, Kyo decided to try to find him so they could figure out a way to make things right again. _That baka probably thought it was a dream come true, finding himself waking up in the same house as Yuki…oh god, I hope he's not doing anything while in my body that I wouldn't do! _

"Crap, I go to this class every day." Kyo muttered after five minutes. "I was sure it was down this way." He turned around. "No, maybe it was that way…"

He began to feel very dizzy as he walked around corridor after corridor in a daze. Kyo began to feel so stupid, he went to this class everyday! He felt like he knew where it was, and yet, somehow he had taken just one wrong turn and managed to get himself so completely lost.

_Is this what its like for Haru? _Kyo wondered. _Is this what it feels like for him every time he loses his way? _

"Haru!"

At first, forgetting he was in Haru's body, Kyo looked up, expecting to see the other boy somewhere nearby.

"Haru!" An angry looking sensei was poking her head out of a classroom door and looking straight at him. "Haru this is your last chance this week! If you come late to class one more time you're getting detention - a lot of it! Now hurry up and get inside, you're holding up my class!"

_Shit, _Kyo thought. Judging by the venomous look on the sensei's face he decided it would be wiser to sit through the class and wait until lunchbreak to find Haru._ If Haru is even at school…_

Crap, why hadn't he thought of that before? _He's probably not even here! _I_ wouldn't have come myself if I wasn't acting so calm! If I were behaving like myself, I defiantly wouldn't have just carried on like normal! _

Grumbling a little, Kyo entered the classroom and sat down. He quickly learned that this sensei was one of those ones whose only entertainment in life seemed to come from picking on students. And Haru seemed to be the one she had her eye on today. Or maybe he was her main focus everyday...

_I can't believe this is actually happening. I can't believe I'm sitting here, In Haru's class…in his body! Pretending to be him!_

"Haru, you have sixty seconds to give me the answer."

"Huh?" Kyo blinked suddenly realising he hadn't heard a word the sensei had been saying.

"No, Haru, 'huh' is not good enough. Fifty seconds left."

Kyo stared blankly. He could feel everyone's eyes on him and something inside him started to stir as the woman began to tap her foot impatiently.

"This isn't good enough Haru!" she snapped. "You _never _can answer any of the questions you are asked during class, and you're _failing_ most of your subjects."

_Failing… _

_Failing…_

_Failing…_

The word seemed to echo around the room. Kyo was shocked that the teacher had said something like that in front of the entire class, and still she continued to rant at him. "You need to take classes more seriously! Not even being able to answer a _simple _question…that suggests you have _problems_! So just snap out of these little dazes that you're always in and –."

Kyo felt something weird starting to happen…he couldn't quite explain it. Whenever he usually got annoyed or someone pissed him off he would simply retort back…but this…this was different, he could feel something dark, building inside him, trying to explode and he didn't know how to stop it…

Then he felt something else…almost like thoughts that weren't his own, but it was more like a feeling that he somehow understood. _They all think that I'm dumb. Just because I have a blank face all the time, just because I go off in a daze and can't pay attention during class because it's so boring. The teachers purposely pick on me so they can imply that I'm stupid…_

_But it's not me…it's Haru. I'm feeling what Haru normally feels, _Kyo realised, and at that moment he saw it; an image in his mind…flashes of a memory that wasn't his.

_Adult voices…laughing._

_"The most idiotic of the twelve zodiacs? Why the ox of course, he was dumb enough to let the rat use him like that."_

_"Ha, ha, ha, so glad my own child didn't turn out to be the ox…yes I would be so ashamed…and Hatsuharu Sohma? It looks like his human form is just as stupid as his animal, have you seen the way he just sits around with that blank look on his face all the time? It's like he has only half-a-brain…"_

There was a snigger from one side of the classroom, a giggle from the other.

That was all it took to trigger whatever it was that had been building up inside him.

"QUIT MOCKING ME!" Kyo roared, standing up and shoving his desk so forcefully that it splintered into pieces the moment it hit the ground.

Eyes widened, gasps sounded, voices muttered…

Whispered words brushed against his ears…

"_He needs to get serious help…"_

"_Yeah, like spending the rest of his life in anger management!"_

"…_couldn't even answer such a simple, simple question…" _

"_What the hell is wrong with him…?"_

_Laughter._

Kyo felt this thing that he couldn't control rushing over him in a violent, wild, wave, he was shouting stuff at the teacher who was shouting back at him, telling him frantically to calm down. He wasn't aware of the exact words that exploded from his mouth, couldn't control them or understand them as they burst forth…all he knew was that right now he felt like tearing up anything he could get his hands on. The anger…it was so strong that he _had _to release it somehow; he had to destroy something, anything….

_Oh god, _Kyo thought in panic, _I can't control it! I can't seem to stop myself from saying these things or reacting this way…it's like, even though I have my own thoughts even though I'm still me… I can't help acting the way Haru would. I've gone 'black'! _

It was an incredibly strange feeling, being able to think his own thoughts while he watched what he did and couldn't stop it.

It was frightening.

_I wonder if part of Haru ever feels this…when he goes black, or when he returns white after going black…is he scared that he loses control? Is he scared that he can't be sure of what he will do each time he becomes so angry? _

Having no control…that was something that scared Kyo a lot, and right now… he was terrified.


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N:** Thank you to everyone who has reviewed my first two chapters!:) Last chapter was about how Kyo was dealing with waking up in Haru's body…this chapter goes back in time a little bit, to show how Haru reacts when he first wakes up that morning…_

**Chapter 3**

Haru knew from the moment he woke, before he even opened his eyes, that something wasn't right. Looking around the room he immediately recognised it as Kyo's.

_How on earth did I end up in Kyo's room, in his bed? _

There was no sight of the neko, so, telling himself this would soon all make sense, he slid out of the bed and headed towards the door, his heart thumping harder with each step.

_Why do I suddenly feel so shaken? It's like I'm about to find out something I don't want to know…_

_Ba-dump, ba-dump, ba-dump... _

_Why am I getting so worked up? _Haru asked himself. Sure, it was natural to get nervous in strange and unusual situations, but he usually managed to keep a level head. That didn't seem to be working today and though his thoughts were calm, his breathing and heart rate had quickened and he found himself shaking slightly as he reached for the door handle.

_Something is wrong…_

He turned the handle and opened the door slowly before taking a cautious step out.

"AHHHH!" Haru let out a shocked shout as he almost collided with Tohru, leaping back just in time to avoid it.

Then he froze.

_Why did I just shout like that? It sounded…it sounded just like – _

"Kyo-kun! Good morning!" Tohru smiled brightly.

"I'M NOT KYO!" Haru roared before he could stop himself and then he stormed towards the bathroom, knowing quite suddenly, instinctively where it was.

He looked at his reflection in the mirror.

And screamed.

"Kyo-kun?! Kyo-kun what's wrong?" Tohru burst in, waving her hands about trying to figure out why Kyo was just standing there, staring at his reflection in the mirror and screaming.

"Baka neko!" Yuki ambled in, still half asleep and whacked Haru over the head, effectively shutting him up. Haru turned to Yuki, whom he loved and had never fought before, and suddenly he _wanted_ to fight him.

_Why am I feelings this overwhelming urge to hit him back?_ Haru wondered, in that moment completely forgetting his main problem, concerned only with this sudden feeling. _Why do I feel like I have to attack Yuki to prove that I'm not weaker than him? Why do I suddenly have such a strong desire to defeat him?_

Yuki had walked away, down the stairs, and Haru, in Kyo's body followed. Each step he took, he only felt it… this feeling…stronger and stronger.

_I really want to defeat that rat… I really want to prove I can be just as good as him, even better so that I'll have honour and gain acceptance as- _

Where had those thoughts come from? Haru didn't want to fight Yuki, though there were many other, more pleasurable things he would have enjoyed doing...  
As soon as Haru though that, he felt a wave of hatred rush through him.

_That damn rat, always so smug about defeating me…if only just once I could win…_

Before he could stop himself, Haru charged at Yuki and a fight soon broke out. As they traded swings and blows it felt familiar…like fighting with Yuki was something he did often…something he was used to.

"You waste so much of my time." Yuki sighed, easily gaining the upper hand. "It's not even interesting anymore, you don't seem to be improving, in fact I would say you're actually getting worse each time!" Yuki laughed softly then leapt high into the air, aiming a kick at the centre of his opponent's chest. The impact sent Haru flying back and crashing through the thin doors before thudding to the ground and skidding for some way along the sharp rocky and slippery mud covered earth.

"Why don't you just give up? Why don't you just get over yourself?" Yuki spat, "You keep on trying when you don't even realise it's no use what you do because one thing will never change. You will always be the neko of the zodiac, it doesn't matter if you defeat me or not. Nothing can change that! You spend so much time focusing on something that will never result in anything; you really don't even have a purpose for living except to bore people like me. You're _pathetic_." Yuki swung around on his heels, and stalked off.

Haru lay in the dirt, unable to move from a mixture of pain and shock. "Yu-ki," he chocked out. "I didn't mean to…"

_Yuki…thinks I'm Kyo…that's who he sees me as…_Haru suddenly remembered. _I can feel it…Kyo's hatred of Yuki…and I can also feel…the pain. _

_The pain?_

_Oh god, why does what he said to me hurt so much? _

Haru shook his head trying to clear it. _As if I don't already have enough confusing things to think about…now it seems I've switched bodies with Kyo?! And while I can't hear his thoughts I seem to be feeling and experiencing his emotions and reactions and don't seem to be able to stop myself from acting how he would! _

He lay there on his back wondering what to do.

"Sohma-kun!"

The sound of Tohru's anxious voice distracted him and he looked back towards the house to see Yuki gently telling her not to fuss over the broken door. Seeing them together…he felt a wave of jealousy and he wasn't sure if it was his or Kyo's. For some reason, as he looked at Tohru he also felt a mixture of guilt.

_The roof._

He was supposed to be going to school, but he felt too confused and distressed, and he had this one feeling as if only he went and sat up there on the roof, he would feel a lot calmer.

_That's a really strange feeling since I'm usually not good at dealing with heights…_

That's where Haru found himself for most of the rest of the day - on the rooftop.

_I hope Kyo is okay…_

How had this happened? More importantly, why didn't he go and tell someone?

Why hadn't he said anything? Maybe it was because part of him was afraid that the notion was too impossible and to admit it out loud would be to admit he was going insane.

But then, he was pretty open minded, and he was sure stranger things had happened…

So even if he weren't going insane, who would believe him? They would all just laugh. And if they didn't what could they do about it anyway? Haru doubted this was the type of thing Hatori could cure. There was really no one he could tell, no one who would believe him, no one who he could trust…

For a moment Haru felt such a strong feeling of not belonging…. Of being somewhere he shouldn't be, of having no one to turn to, of feeling completely and utterly trapped with no way out…

It was like being stranded in a foreign country and needing help urgently but every person he turned to couldn't understand him…

But …maybe there was one person who would. He hadn't thought about it first out of pure habit of rejecting the idea of being able to turn to this person…but he might be in the same situation as Haru now…he was his only chance to help him figure out how to make things right again.

"Kyo."

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_Hope you enjoyed this chapter...:) Next chapter, Haru and Kyo try to find each other… _


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N: **__Its been a while between updates, I feel sooo bad for not updating this sooner (and I would have if it was possible :P) but finally I have the time to work on my fanfic so I hope there are still people who are interested in it. I will try to post the following chapters much sooner if people still want to read it :) _

_**Previously: **__Kyo and Haru have woken up to find they have appeared to switch bodies! To make matters more complicated they seem to be inheriting each others behaviour and emotions which is confusing the two boys terribly. Kyo-in-Haru's body has gone to school to find Haru, only to end up experiencing his black side first hand and getting into a lot of trouble. Meanwhile, Haru-as-Kyo was actually staying up on the roof all day, being moody after an unpleasant encounter with Yuki. _

pls forgive any spelling/grammar errors I may have missed /

* * *

**Chapter 4**

Kyo stared at the ground as Haru's parents talked with the principle. Apparently the teachers were all getting tired of his "little anger problem", those outbursts that he couldn't control. Apparently he needed 'help'. He could feel the disappointment and embarrassment radiating from Haru's parents. He shouldn't care…but…

_I feel sorry for Haru. I really used to think that black side of his was mostly an act used to manipulate people…but if it's always like this for him…he can't even control it…_

Kyo suddenly felt chocked up with guilt. _I never realised what it was like for you Haru… I never realised…_

Haru's parents left, while Kyo was made to stay back after school to clean up the classroom he had trashed.

"Great, just great,"he grumbled. Now that he wouldn't be able to find Haru in school, he would have to go back to Shigure's. Part of him just couldn't stand not knowing what was happening to Haru. It all felt so unreal…

_Is Haru freaking out over this too? Did he even come to school? What is he doing in my body right now? Could he simply be carrying on like normal, thinking it's a weird dream and that any moment he'll wake up and be himself again?_

Kyo had never felt particularly proud to be who he was, had never been happy with his life or viewed himself in a positive light. It was true; he was often envious of others, those who were smarter, cleverer, more social and got on easily with other people. Those who did things with ease and weren't so…awkward. Those who were respected and admired by others…

Those who were accepted.

_Haven't I always wished that just once I could see what its like to be someone else? Haven't I always wanted to feel what it's like to live someone else's life if only for one day? Someone who belonged…someone who people looked up to and respected? _

_To me, Haru has always seemed to be a person like that…_

_But…there was so much I ignored…_

Switching bodies with him, seeing things through Haru's eyes…it wasn't what Kyo could ever have imagined at all…and it wasn't something that he wished to continue experiencing…

_I can feel things…things I've never felt before…I can feel his emotions from memories he holds buried deep…and what's more is I can't help having the feeling that I've only just scraped the surface… _

Kyo was scared. He didn't know what to do, and he didn't want to find out more things that he couldn't help caring about. _I can't help caring…I…I don't want to care so much when there's nothing I could ever do! There's nothing that the neko could ever do to help! _

_--------------------_

"Kyo-kun! Are you feeling okay? Did you spend all day up here?" Tohru appeared next to Haru, who was lying on the roof, eyes closed. He blinked up at her about to greet her but froze, hit by a sudden wave of emotions…

They surprised him. He had long suspected Kyo had a soft spot for the kind-hearted girl, but the emotions that he was feeling right now…well there was admiration, and there was also awkwardness and embarrassment, at her gentle words. Kyo wasn't used to it, didn't know how to react to them, Haru guessed. However, much stronger than these feelings…was something else…striking in its unpleasantness, something disturbing that he couldn't quite give a name to…feelings of …sadness? No…it was more than that, other dark emotions mixed in…guilt? Shame?

"I'm fine," he managed to tell her. " I was feeling sick this morning so I decided to stay home today, but I feel much better now."

Tohru nodded. "Well, you should go rest and I shall make the special soup I make for sick people just in case you're still a bit under the weather!"

Haru raised an eyebrow wondering what she was talking about. But what he wanted to know even more was why the thought was giving him the strongest feeling to run away…

-------------------

_I AM SICK AND TIRED OF THIS! _Kyo shouted in his mind as he walked through the woods trying to find his way to Shigure's house where he hoped Haru would be. _Find Haru…then I can work out a way to get my body back and only worry about my own stupid emotions! _

Yes, he could control his own emotions; he could block them out and force himself to just feel _nothing_. He had long ago learnt it was easier that way…but try as he might, he couldn't do the same to Haru's and he couldn't act like himself which was especially annoying in a situation such as this where he wanted to get somewhere quickly and just found himself lost. _Dammit! I'm sure I've passed this very same tree about three times already! Don't tell me I'm walking around in circles…_

A sparkling on the ground caught his eye and made him bend down for closer inspection. _Hey, it must be some of that dust that fell all over us yesterday! _An excited thought suddenly came to him: _maybe I can use this to switch us back!_

Kyo scooped up two huge handfuls of the sparkling dust-speckled soil and poured it into his pockets.

_Now, lets just hope I can find Shigure's house sometime soon…_

------------------

"Ahhhh!" Kyo felt Haru's black side roar up and he punched a nearby tree as hard as he could, causing the skin on his knuckles to scrape off and warm blood to dribble down his hand.

"I'm sick of seeing you, you stupid, evil, tree! How is it possible I keep managing to bump into you when I go in _entirely different_ directions each time! How dammit, hooooow!?!"

Kyo sighed, suddenly exhausted; not even when he was little could he remember ever having becoming so lost and he was not handling this new experience well.

"Yuki-kun, how many leeks do you think we should pick?"

"Kyo seems pretty sick so we should gather quite a few, _just for him_."

_Huh? _Kyo inched closer to where he could hear the voices and soon he saw Tohru and Yuki walking along, Tohru carrying a basket in her hands. Not knowing what else to do, he followed them, hoping that they would lead him back to Shigure's.

Kyo was about to call out to them when his eyes settled on Yuki and he felt _that _again…a wave of emotion wash over him that _defiantly _wasn't his.

_Adoration…admiration…respect…_and some _sadness._ It wasn't straight out love as Kyo had expected, and he was kind of relieved because having to feel that while looking at Yuki, even though he knew it wasn't his own emotion, that thought alone was just too disturbing for words.

Understanding came to Kyo suddenly.

_Haru admires Yuki for his composure…he never loses his control, unlike Haru. He adores him because Yuki was the first to make him realise that not everyone would automatically think he was stupid just because a curse said so…_

But there was something else…what was that that he was feeling….

_Oh shit. I'm attracted to Yuki._ Kyo mentally shuddered. _No this is so wrong! Haru you are sick! A sick perverted bastard, get me out of here and give me my own body and my own emotions back!_

Kyo decided then, not to let himself be seen because he was too afraid of how he might act around or towards Yuki while he was in Haru's body. _There are only so many disturbing things I can handle right now, and that is not one of them! _

He followed Tohru and Yuki all the way to Yuki's little garden, grimacing as they picked a large bundle of leeks, though for some reason he didn't feel as disgusted as he normally would, then he followed them back to Shigure's house and sneaked in around the back door, taking the stairs two at a time, up to his room.

----------------

The moment he opened the door, it began to poor with rain outside.

"Kyo!"

Kyo breathed a sigh of relief, never had he thought he would be so glad to see…well _himself _before!

"Haru!"

It was so, so strange to be looking at himself, seeing his body and not being in it! Haru and Kyo simply stared at each other for a moment, realising that each had gone through the same thing…neither was imagining it, the whole situation was very, very real.

"Kyo," Haru said, speaking with Kyo's voice, from his lips…it was so disturbing. "Do you have any idea why we appear to have switched bodies?" he looked very pale, and slowly sat down. Kyo realised it must have been because of the rain. Mentally he cheered, _yes, for once, just once I don't have to feel like shit just because of some water dripping from the sky! _

"That strange girl you smashed into yesterday." Kyo snapped, "That weird powder that fell over us…that must be what did this to us. She's obviously some kind of witch, magician, magical, mystical something- a- rather."

"Oh yeah…but why…" Haru mumbled. "I feel so weak all of a sudden…"

"That's what happens to me when it rains."

"Oh."

"Well, it doesn't matter because in a few moments we can be back in our own bodies and pretend this whole disturbing occasion never occurred." Kyo showed him some of the glittering soil he had scooped up. "See, its some of that bewitched dust, lets sprinkle it over ourselves and hopefully it will change us back."

Haru stared at him blankly for a heartbeat.

"ARE YOU CRAZY?" his eyes flared and then died down as he exhausted himself from the outburst.

Kyo twitched, feeling the need to shout back, but instead he said calmly, "Do you have a better idea? If we swapped bodies because this stuff fell on us, them there is at least a _chance_ that it might also reverse the process."

Haru shrugged. "Fine…but don't you feel a little silly…"

Kyo just grabbed a handful of the dust and tossed it over himself and Haru. He closed his eyes, waiting for something to happen.

_Silence. _

Kyo opened one eye. Then the other. He looked down at himself and swore. "Why am I still in you're body?" he asked Haru.

"How the hell should I know?!" Haru snapped, two cat ears popped up on his head in anger.

Kyo stared. _Does that always happen to me when I get angry so quickly? _

"Keep calm…maybe…maybe…think back to when it happened last…maybe we have to wait a few hours! Yeah…that's it."

---------------------

"Kyo…why don't you like it here?" Haru broke the silence.

"What?"

"Ever since I've been here, in your body…I can feel it…some of your emotions…you feel so trapped…you want to escape…but why? It's not so bad…you have a lot more freedom than I have some of the time…at least you don't have to see Akito so much…and you have a lovely person like Tohru –"

_Shut up shut up! Don't bring Tohru into this! _Kyo wanted to shout. "It's none of your business! So just shut up."

They had been sitting in an awkward silence for almost an hour, Kyo getting up to pace back and forth while Haru had just watched him, too dreary from the rain. "I don't think this is going to work…last time, when it first happened I mean….we fell on each other as you tackled me to the ground – "

"I did NOT tackle you to the ground I simply pushed you out of the way –"

"You freaking threw yourself ON me."

"I did not!"

"You did too, don't see why you had to do that, you could have just called out to me to warn me."

Kyo clenched his jaw. "You don't want to make me go BLACK do you?" he smirked. "Or maybe you should just keep going and get a taste of your own medicine."

Haru looked at him with wide eyes. "Okay, okay that's not important, lets not argue. Just what I was tyring to say is that I think we need physical contact as the dust falls on us, I think that's why we swapped, if its some kind of enchanted powder stuff…then we would need to have contact to swap back."

"…."

"So lets embrace and you throw some of that soil over us again."

"What? There's absolutely no need for that!"

"Why are you so against it, its just like hugging yourself."

"Why does that sound so very, very wrong?" Kyo grumbled, but he decided to give it a try. Something told him that if merely sprinkling the dust over themselves was going to be sufficient, he would already feel the effects by now. _Yesterday…I didn't think so much of it yesterday because I was dazed from our fight but…I could feel a tingling all over my skin…like a buzz of energy or…well, magic. But I don't feel that now…_

Kyo swallowed, feeling heat rise to his cheeks as Haru got up from the bed and walked over to him, slipping his arms around him and pulling the boy close. Kyo wanted to protest as their chests came into contact - way more contact than was needed! - and he felt himself blushing even more…

_Even though when I look at him it looks like me…I know its still him in there… I really don't feel comfortable doing this! _

Kyo let out a yelp mentally, though his face remained blank, when Haru reached into the pocket in his jeans to get some of the soil.

"I could have got that myself!" Kyo mumbled as he felt Haru's hand brush against him.

Haru apologised and it sounded so strange coming out in Kyo's voice.

"Here we go." He said, and sprinkled some of the dust over them.

_In just a few moments, everything will be normal again…_Kyo thought. _Or will it…even when I'm back in my own body, will I be able to just act normal towards Haru or has too much happened for that now?_ He shuddered, suddenly feeling a wave of apprehension, as part of him knew no matter what, nothing would be the same between Haru and him again…


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: **_Thank you very much to Snow Ahriman and DesertRoseTemari for your reviews : ) Yes, I wanted someone to see Kyo and Haru hugging too…:P though there are plenty of other opportunities for them to be 'caught' lol'…well read this chapter and you will know what I mean : P _

* * *

"IT DIDN'T WORK!" Haru shouted.

_Why did I just shout that so loud when it's my fault?_ _This is my fault…and now Kyo has to suffer being trapped in my body…_

"There's only one thing left to do then." Kyo said calmly looking at himself and noticing that Haru's observation was correct – they were still in each other's bodies. "We go and find that girl, wherever she is, and make her switch us back."

Haru sighed and nodded. "Yeah, looks like that's the only option left…"

"We'll find her in the morning. So get out of here, now."

Haru blinked. "Excuse me?!"

"Even if I may LOOK like you at this moment, this is still my room and I want to sleep!"

"And where do you expect me to go?"

"Back to your own room!"

"I can't go back there looking like YOU!" Haru screeched. "You know the neko isn't supposed to go there without an invitation! You look like me right now so it will be fine for YOU to go!"

"NO! No…I refuse to go near there…" Kyo looked at the ground. "I…I'm sca- I mean…I don't want to…its too close to Akito."

Haru sighed, feeling the anger draining from him. "I…I know what you mean."

Kyo nodded. "I'm sorry, I understand why you don't want to go back either, especially looking like me. Besides, I forgot about the rain…I know how it feels for me when it rains so…you can take the bed, okay."

_Wow…_Haru thought, slightly amused, _Kyo is so calm at the moment…it must be part of my influence haha. It's so strange to be here with him and not fighting…but its kind of nice…_

"Just be really quiet and don't let ANYONE find out I'm here, okay?" Kyo warned Haru.

Haru mumbled a yes, crawling under the covers and closed his eyes, already drifting off to sleep.

Kyo sighed. _Haru is so…much more complex than I thought he was… he's so strange and different…but I am surprised at how much we seem to have in common…these little moments when we seem to understand each other…its never happened before. Suddenly I feel…_

"Ahh! Why am I even thinking such confusing thoughts?" Kyo exclaimed out loud. Perhaps it was because he knew the real reason why he was so eager to swap back. _I'm worried Haru will be able to sense and feel my insecurities…he can already sense some of them and he already thinks I'm pathetic enough… _

Why did it suddenly bother Kyo so much what Haru thought of him?

_It's just…I don't want Haru to know… how much I loath myself…I don't want him to know… how pathetic I really am…_

-----------------------

Kyo waited till everyone had finished eating and gone off to their rooms. Tohru had come in once (and he had hid behind the door) watching as she placed a bowl of leek soup on the table by his bed for him to eat when he woke up. Kyo crinkled his nose in disgust, glad he didn't mind the smell so much at the moment.

He glanced over at Haru, seeing him shivering from the cold, and then snuck out of the room, looking left and right, making sure no one was around. _Got to make sure I don't bump into Yuki, yikes! And I defiantly don't want the others to know I'm having Haru sleep in my room!_

After about five minutes Kyo located the kitchen where he gathered as many snack-foods as he could and put it in a bag for the next day. _Just in case we become lost..._

He wandered about searching for the cupboard where he knew there were spare blankets and pillows and finally found then after what seemed like forever, then he headed back to his room.

Kyo was about to lie down to sleep on the floor when he looked over at Haru again and noticed the boy was still shivering. Kyo sighed, looking at how Haru had kicked off his covers in his sleep. _I better put them back on him or his whimpering will keep me awake all night…_

Kyo was halfway through pulling up a blanket over Haru when he heard footsteps outside the door. All he had time to do was freeze before it burst open.

"KYO-KUN! Tohru asked me to see if your feeling any better – " Shigure stopped short, his mouth dropping open at the sight he saw.

_Haru tucking a sleeping Kyo into bed…_

"Awwww! TOHRU! YUKI! You have to see this!! Come here right now!" Shigure hollered. "I JUST CAUGHT HARU PLAYING NURSE WITH KYO!"

Tohru popped her head around the door. "Hatsuharu-san is looking after Kyo-kun while he's sick? How very considerate and sweet!"

" I knew it, I knew it!" Shigure did a little dance. "I knew there was something going on between you two!"

-------------------------

"Haru…psst! Haru! Hey! Oi! Get up, we have to escape before Shigure wakes up again!"

"Mmmmph." Haru, still occupying Kyo's body, simply groaned and rolled over. He was still a little sluggish even though the rain had stopped hours ago. Kyo was still fuming inside over the embarrassing incident that had occurred. Still, he had somehow managed to simply walk over to the door calmly, and close it in Shigure's face.

That had not put the man off though; he had simply kept on making comments through the door. It was a good thing that Kyo was in Haru's form and couldn't seem to care enough to get pissed off about it. He simply sat there, fuming inside but saying nothing out load, hoping the dog would give up soon.

After what had seemed like hours Shigure had gotten bored and gone to bed. The sun was just beginning to fade the darkness of the night and Kyo knew it was now or never to make an escape before Shigure decided to torment him again. Really, the man had no life.

"HARU!" Kyo kicked him in the gut. At once the boy's eyes snapped open and neko ears popped up on his head.

"WHAT THE –" His outraged cry was muffled by Kyo slamming a hand against his mouth.

"Shut up you baka!" he hissed. "Come on we have to go."

Haru stared up at the boy who looked identical to how Haru himself should have looked. _How much of me is left inside, or is it all just an illusion covered by a similar shell? _

Whatever it was, it was beginning to get harder and harder for him to tell them apart. _I feel like the longer I'm inside Kyo's body, the more I'm becoming him…I'm merging with his feelings, his character…his essence…and yet…he's over there…in my body. _

Haru sighed, calming down. "Okay, just let me get changed first."

"…."

"What?"

"………" _Shit, _Kyo thought. _He want's to get changed…Even if he acts like me…I still know how perverted Haru really is! _

Haru smirked, catching on. "Don't worry Kyo. I won't peak. Besides, its not like I haven't already seen it all before."

_Wha!?_ Kyo's mind screeched.

---------------------

"…a girl, about yay tall," Kyo gestured with his hand, "She has really pale, pale blue eyes-"

"They weren't blue Kyo, they were silver. There's no other way to describe them."

"Shut up! They were blue! And she had hair that was a darker, deeper blue."

"What are you colour-blind? It was dark _green_."

Kyo turned angrily to Haru and tried to say patiently, "What you are describing is a _completely different girl_! Now there was only ONE girl we bumped into, so could you please forget about this stupid little version your demented and retarded memory has conjured up and stop confusing the people I'm trying to ask for help?"

"Excuse me? You're the one with the memory flaw here, you moron!" Haru shot back.

"As if! May I remind you that your the one who didn't even notice she was coming and about to smash right into you!" Kyo exclaimed, his eyes darkening. " You hardly ever notice anything, so I think my memory is a bit more reliable! If you weren't such a bonehead and actually paid attention to things that were more than two centimetres away from your eyes then we wouldn't be in this mess in the first place!"

Kyo knew he had gone too far when he saw the look on…well, on his face….but somehow, looking into his eyes, he could see Haru in there, and he knew he had hurt him.

"…. You're right, Kyo." Haru said quietly.

_No…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to- _But the words wouldn't come out. Huffing, Kyo turned back to the guy they had been questioning about the girl.

He was gone.

Just like that, Kyo could feel his mind clouding over once more…_black Haru is coming, but I really don't care…I want it…it feels…it almost feels like myself…_

"Shit Haru, look what you did now, you made him run away!" Kyo roared.

"IT WASN'T MY FAULT YOU STUPID COW!" Haru roared back, seeming to welcome Kyo's outburst.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING A COW? JUST BECAUSE I LOOK LIKE YOU! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU MAN?"

Haru paused for a second. _I didn't even realise I said that…_

He looked back up at Kyo. "Real great idea of yours! Just ask every person we come across if they know some girl that YOU can't even remember correctly what she looks like! That could take us, months, years!"

"Oh yeah? Well you got a better idea then you…you…." It was hard to insult someone who looked just like you were supposed to…

"………"

"See, didn't think so, baka. Well we have to do _something_! I'm sick of putting up with this crap! I'm sick trying to control your stupid black side -."

"Well I'm sick of trying to control your outbursts that occur ALL THE TIME!" Haru shouted. "And why do your stupid neko ears and tail always pop up when you get angry. I think you're the one who needs to learn control!"

_It's scary how we're both even more similar than we realised…_

"Excuse me."

Haru and Kyo stopped their arguing at the sound of the quiet voice, searching around trying to see where it came from.

"Excuse me…"

They looked down. There was a young girl, she looked about eight years old and was staring up at them with wide, solemn brown eyes. She spoke in a mature manner that seemed out of place with her age.

"I couldn't help but overhear your conversation before. About a girl with silver to blue eyes and green-blue hair, and I think I might know of who you seek."

"Really?" Kyo asked, hope in his voice. "Do you know where she lives?"

The girl nodded. "I can show you."


	6. Chapter 6

Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed the last chapters : ) and to _Keir_, it is so nice to know that my updates cheered you up after being sick also I would love to read any fics you write where you use Kyo's weakness during the rain hehe :P

**In the last chapter: **Kyo and Haru (still in the wrong bodies!) went out in what seemed a futile attempt to find the girl they believe is responsible for their situation. However, they were in luck, as they were approached by a young girl who told the boys she can show them where to find the girl they seek…

* * *

**Chapter 6**

"I can't believe we are actually considering the map of a eight year old, Kyo!" Haru raged. "Even if she does appear to have quite an artistic talent - but that's not the point! How do we know this isn't just some prank? This could all just be some kind of game for her!"

Kyo shook his head while he studied the map. "This place…. it's so far away."

"Kyo! Are you even listening? Stop acting like your seriously considering this!"

Kyo snapped out of his dazed state, and turned to the other boy, wanting him to see reason. "Haru, think about it, this whole situation isn't entirely normal, so I'm willing to take any lead I can to make things right again!"

"Well fine, I want to make things right again too.I know that you don't want the others to know, but perhaps it's a good idea to go and tell just Hatori and then ask him to drive us to this girl's dwelling."

Kyo waved the map about in the air. "Well for one thing baka, there's no way that we can _drive _to _this _location! If we tell anyone else, what good is it going to do? No matter how I look at it, all they will do is slow us down. Besides, Hatori will most definitely inform Akito, and who knows what he would do? He might force us to remain here like this just for his amusement! Or, he might claim we have both gone insane and lock us away!"

Haru snatched the map from Kyo's grasp and paled as he studied it. If he didn't get the feeling that Kyo was dead serious about following this supposed lead he would have laughed. "Kyo…if this map is correct, the girl lives in a cave, at the top of a mountain." He sweat dropped. "This has got to be a joke."

"I really wish it was! Well, what would you rather do? Go take our chances on this…or go back to school as if it's any other day? Oh I bet you would love that wouldn't you? Because for once in your life you would actually be able to answer the simple questions a teacher asks you in class!"

Haru's mouth dropped open, and for a second he was too surprised and cut by the remark to even say anything.

Before it turned into another argument however, Kyo turned the other way. He hadn't meant to say that to Haru and he felt bad about it. In an attempt to explain he began speaking again, very calmly, "I don't know how much longer I can take this. Things were already so complicated…now….I don't even know who I am, what is my use in being here…"

_Stop now! _His mind warned him, to guard his feelings, keep these thoughts inside, but once he started, the words kept poring from his mouth. "Why am I in this world when I never do any good? I don't even belong…I don't belong anywhere. I carry this darkness around with me…I couldn't even sought out my own thoughts before…and now…now its like there are so many other feelings all mixed up with mine so that I don't even know who or what I am anymore! I feel like I'm becoming nothing…. I don't know what to do…I just want things to be simple…I don't even know who I am anymore!"

Haru took a step closer to Kyo, raising his arms slightly as if to wrap them around the other boy to offer him comfort. But he dropped them at the last minute.

"I know what you mean Kyo. I feel like I couldn't deal with nothing before…and now, I'm too confused to even try. And I can't even block these feelings out…. and I feel like I'm struggling, trying to sort out what's me and what's not…what's real and what's just all a part of this magic that has caused us to switch bodies…"

Kyo turned around again, and rubbed his eyes, as if he had been about to cry.

"I don't think we have a choice Haru. We have to get back our bodies before we both go insane."

-----------------------

_What happened before? _Kyo wondered as he followed Haru, who at the moment had the better direction skills. _It seems like I was managing okay…but every time I look at him and see myself…I get this strangest sense like I'm losing myself...or maybe not that, more like…I feel like we are becoming one… _

_There's nothing good about the neko of the zodiac…there's nothing to like about the cat…right now we are sharing a bond like no other…I have to protect Haru from the curse…I can't let him suffer like this for much longer…his place in this world has a purpose…_

What if they were trapped in each other's bodies forever?

That was the worry that was really nagging on Kyo's mind. _Haru doesn't deserve that…_

_Things used to be so simple…concentrate all my energy into training. Into beating that stupid rat…then I would find my place. Don't think about anything else…concentrate on that…but now, I'm so confused… I'm beginning to feel like concentrating all my energy on defeating Yuki is such an insignificant purpose…I'm beginning to feel like there must be more to my existence…and now I'm thinking too much and I don't want to!_

Haru looked behind to make sure Kyo hadn't strayed off. _He looks so worried about something… _

Suddenly, Haru was hit by something….a memory…but not his….at least not from his perspective …

_"Oni chan will you show me where the bathroom is?" A young Haru held out his hand to Kyo. Kyo's eyes widened slightly before they quickly returned to normal, hiding his surprise. He grabbed Haru's hand and dragged him forward._

_"You're hopeless, you know that?" the young Kyo sighed, but showed him the way nevertheless. And secretly…_

Haru could feel what that younger Kyo had been feeling. _He feels secretly pleased…he's surprised that anyone would ask for his help, that out of everyone, Haru came to him for help. He could have asked Yuki…he came to me instead._

Haru blinked. Ah…he remembered….most other children who knew Kyo was the neko would stay away from him. But that hadn't bothered Haru. He had always sort of admired Kyo, and they had spent some time training together when they were young…_back then…he was always the one to find me when I got lost…I forgot about that…_

It hadn't seemed significant then, and so much had changed since…such a long time ago, the childhood memory…but now it seemed important. _How could I forget…it was always him…_

----------------------

Kyo kept getting them. Memories. Of becoming lost. But they weren't his. He would be walking, following Haru through the woods, and suddenly, for a second it looked like he was somewhere else, and he was all alone. He would turn around, in circles and circles.

_Where am I? Where am I?_

Then he would blink and he was following Haru again.

Kyo stopped for a second, closing his eyes trying to focus. _This is hurting my head…_

He opened them again and looked around. All he saw was trees. Where was Haru?

"Haru?!" He called.

_Oh great, another 'memory' of getting lost._

But this one was lasting longer than the rest.

"Haru??" Kyo found himself calling because he didn't know what else to do, didn't know how to snap out of it. _It feels so real…what if it's not just a memory?_

"HARU!" Kyo called and began to jog through the woods looking for the other boy.

Trees, trees, trees. Surrounding him. Everywhere. That's all there was. Trees, trees and more trees. But no Haru.

Everywhere he turned it looked the same and Kyo was beginning to feel more and more dizzy. There was no one around to help him and he felt a growing fear that if he didn't find his way out soon he could be trapped here forever.

_Am I going somewhere or am I just standing here spinning in circles?_ It was getting hard to tell. Kyo could feel the panic beginning to bubble up from deep inside of him. He wondered faintly if Haru felt as panicked whenever he got lost. _He sure never seems like he cares or is terribly worried about it…_

"Kyo!"

"Huh?" Kyo blinked, and saw himself – no, Haru, standing in front of him, shaking him.

"Kyo, snap out of it!"

Kyo blinked again. "Wha - What happened?"

"You just stopped and were standing there calling out my name over and over." Haru lifted a finger to Kyo's cheek and caught a small tear, looking at it in shock. "Kyo…are you alright? What happened just then?"

Kyo shook his head slightly then he looked up. "I'm fine. It was nothing." His voice was calm. "Let's just get a move on."

-----------------

The boys walked on as it continued to get darker and darker. Kyo didn't like it, he could see quite well in the dark when he was in his own body, due to his neko spirit, however his night vision wasn't nowhere near as good while he was in Haru's body.

"Haru," he said, "We have to stop soon and find a place to rest for the night. I have some food in my bag as well."

"Okay." Haru agreed. His ear's pricked up as he heard a howl in the distance. He wondered just what kind of animals lived out here. They had been walking all day into deeper and deeper forest and were likely far away from any help if something happened to them. He was trying not to think about that worrying thought too much.

"Look, there's a cave in the side of that large cliff there." Kyo said pointing, "Let's shelter there for the night." He stopped Haru before entering. "You might as well wait out here while I check that it's safe. You know, need to make sure there's nothing already occupying the cave…like a bear." He winked.

Haru blinked and shrugged.

A few minutes later Haru heard a large **thump** and then he heard the screams….

"_AHHHHHHHHHHHH! NO!!!!! OH MY GOD HEEEELP SOMEBODY HELP! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"_


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"KYO?" Haru felt his blood run cold._Was there really something already in there? Has something attacked him? Is it ripping him to shreds right now? Devouring him limb by limb?_ Fear tore through him. _NO!!! I shouldn't have waited outside, why did I do that? I should have come with him and protected him! No!_

"KYO!!" Haru shouted again, bursting into the dark entrance of the cave. "KYO! Where are you? ARE YOU ALRIGHT??!"

He rounded the corner and as his eyes started to adjust he began to see the outline of a body slumped on the ground.

"Kyo? Ohmygod! Kyo!" Without even thinking to look around for other danger first, Haru shot straight to Kyo's side.

_"_KYO! Speak to me!" he cried lifting up the limp body. For a moment everything else seemed to still, and the only movement Haru could feel was his heart thumping against his chest in fear. He took three shaky breaths, and then slowly, the thought came to him.

_Hmm, that's strange… I don't see any blood…he doesn't look injured…_

"Ahhhahahaha!" The boy's eyes snapped open and he smirked in a most infuriating fashion. "I can't believe you actually fell for that. Ha ha ha! Man that was priceless! You were so scared! Hahahah!"

Once he had recovered from the shock, Haru growled in anger. "WHY YOU….YOU! HOW COULD YOU DO THAT? YOU REALLY HAD ME SCARED FOR A MOMENT THERE!"

Haru glared as hard as he could at Kyo, wanting to strangle the boy for scaring him so much. But part of him was also…in a confusing way, relieved by his actions. Kyo had seemed to be struggling with trying to handle the situation even more than Haru was and Haru had been quite worried, but the fact that Kyo could still joke around in times like this…well it lightened his concern a bit. In a way, even the fright had been a welcoming distraction…and for some reason, Haru just couldn't stay angry at Kyo for long anymore.

Kyo sat up and shrugged. "At least now we know there isn't anything in here, your screaming would have either scared it away or made it show itself. Ah, but when I threw a stone before, I did manage to hit a rat." He pointed to a little furry black body a metre or so away from him. "You can eat that for dinner and I'll have the rest of the food."

"What!" Haru's eyes went wide, and then he thought about it. "Oh…well you are a cat so I guess you're used to eating things like rats hey? Do you eat birds too?"

Kyo choked a bit. "EW! I was JOKING you octopus-head!"

"Sure you were Kyo. Sure you were. I know your dirty little secret now." Haru returned that infuriating smirk.

Kyo twitched suddenly feeling pissed off again despite joking around only a second before. It was easier to be angry and almost without realising it he began to summon Haru's black side. _I would welcome black right now to shut Haru up when he's being annoying!_

Then it happened again.

He wasn't in the cave anymore…suddenly he was remembering something.

He was looking out of the eyes of a younger Haru, and he was fighting himself as a younger boy:

_"Why!" Kyo growled angrily. "Why is it that you always pick on me?"_

"_Shut up and fight me you pathetic little kitten!" Haru demanded, swinging a fist Kyo's way._

_"Just because I said that one little insult…you blew up!" Kyo was shouting back to Haru._"_Other people say those things to you and you don't even care, you just act like you didn't even hear them. What did I ever do to you to make you want to fight me so much?I don't have time for this, my fight is with that damn rat!"_

What was that…that emotion…that Kyo presently in Haru's body could feel? A hint of ...jealousy?

_The young Haru stopped and all of a sudden he was white again. "It's because…for some reason…only you can make me angry that easily…only you can cause me to react so strongly…"_

_He admires him…no, me, he admired me then. In this memory…he's upset because he admired me and cared about what I said_…Kyo realised with amazement. But the younger Kyo in the memory didn't understand what Haru was talking about.

_"Baka, why did you stop now? If you're going to fight me, then hurry up and fight!"_

_Haru shook his head. That passion Kyo has…that determination in wanting to beat Yuki…sometimes I wish he would show me the same passion…_

Then Kyo became aware of the cave again. _What was that?_ Kyo wondered. _Another memory…but this time…it was even more vivid than before and I could actually almost hear those thoughts Haru had had then…hear them as if they were my own…_

----------------------

"Kyo..." Haru began as they lay on the cave floor trying to get some sleep and hoping there weren't any more rats living there.

"What."

Haru furrowed his brow wondering how to ask what had been on his mind for a while. "You like Honda-san right?"

"What….of course I like her, it's hard not to like someone that _nice_."

"That's not what I mean." Haru said, wondering why this was beginning to bother him.

"You…you more than like her…am I right?"

_Just what is the baka blabbering on about? Why did he suddenly bring up Tohru for? What is the meaning of this!_ Kyo thought frantically.

"Earlier on, when I was talking to her, I could sense something…that you have a soft spot for her."

"That's none of your business." Kyo told Haru calmly.

"Are you ever going to make a move? Ask her out?"

"What?!" Kyo could feel himself getting angry, he didn't like people asking him questions that were none of their business! However, it wasn't something that was drawing Haru's black side out because Haru didn't seem to care.

_Tohru…I really admire a person like her. But…I can't even think of…_

"Why are you asking me these things! Are you ever going to make a move on Yuki instead of always saying things like "today I'm going to make you mine" and then never doing anything about it?!?" Kyo sneered.

"……….."

"Don't know what to say to that now do you!"

"Kyo. I know that I could never make Yuki see me in the same way that I see him. I'm fine with that. This is…what I wanted to know is…I don't understand why you feel shame and guilt when Tohru is around. I can feel it you know. When I'm in your body…I can sometimes sense you're feelings towards a person or situation…"

Haru expected Kyo to get angry or, because he was in his body, just not say anything. Instead, Kyo sighed and said quietly, "I guess it can't be helped."

They lay there in the dark. Haru could see the outline of Kyo a little way away, he had turned so that his back was to Haru who knew he wouldn't be able to see as well in the dark. He must have felt more secure in the darkness where he thought Haru couldn't see him because he began to talk.

"If you must know, the reason I feel that way, and the reason I won't ever become anything more to Tohru than her friend is because…." His voice trailed off for a moment and Haru waited patiently for him to continue.

"Tohru…" Kyo said to himself, almost as if he had forgotten about Haru's presence. "She's such a good, pure person. I never used to care so much how I acted, but…her kind words…I don't know how to react to them…and I don't deserve them. Maybe that's why I feel guilty. Being around her…her goodness only reminds me of whom I really am, of what I really am. She's someone that I've learnt to really like and respect…but Tohru, she deserves someone way better than me. Someone who won't taint her…being so close to her but unable to have her…it's sadness I feel everyday. I have no right to like her… I want to get away…. living in that house….I feel so trapped. Someone like me doesn't belong around other people, especially people like Tohru…. so…. I guess that's why I feel ashamed when I'm around her…."

Haru said nothing for a little while, quite surprised. He had never really realised that Kyo felt that way…usually the only emotion he ever saw the boy express was anger and all other times it was casual indifference.

"Kyo…" he began quietly. "You may be cursed…you may have more burdens than the rest of the zodiacs and be considered an outcast…but that doesn't make you a bad person… It doesn't make you not good enough for Tohru, it doesn't make you less of a human."

_Why…? _Kyo thought. _Why is Haru saying these nice things to me? _He wasn't used to it and he didn't know what to do. _There must be a catch…besides…Haru couldn't possibly understand how I really feel… _

"I don't know why I told you that. But I don't want to talk about it, now shut up so I can sleep." He said coldly.

_Kyo…_Haru thought sadly, a bit confused himself as to why he was starting to feel _differently _about the other boy. _I want to protect him… I want to take away these bad feelings he has…I want to help him…I want to take away his pain. _

But maybe that was all just a side effect of their strange situation.

-------------------------

Dark. Cold.

_It's so dark and cold…_Kyo thought, half asleep a few hours later. _Perhaps this is the kind of place I really belong? _

_But I want the warmth…_

Both Haru and Kyo's nights were filled with mixed thoughts, memories and troubling dreams, and in the morning they were both more than ready to set off and finally get their own bodies back.

* * *

_Next Chapter: Kyo and Haru finally reach their destination, but what, and who exactly will they find there:) _


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

"Hurry up Haru! I can see the mountains up ahead! My God they are huge – it's going to take us forever to climb the specific one!"

Kyo looked back when Haru didn't reply and saw the other boy had stopped and was rubbing his stomach slightly with a sad little look on his face.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Kyo asked, and Haru thought he could almost hear concern in his voice.

"…. I have this sudden craving for a…nice…big…"

"…Yes…?"

"Glass of milk."

"……keep moving."

"But I want some milk."

"Just shut up and keep on moving!"

---------

According to the map, they had to climb the mountain all the way till almost the top where they were supposed to find a cave and enter it. There in that cave they would find the girl they sought.

Kyo had been in front before, telling Haru to hurry up, but now their positions seemed to have reversed. Haru was aching all over but he was suddenly feeling a raw determination like nothing else. He wondered if he was getting it from being inside Kyo's body.

_We are so close now…I can't give up…_

"Hurry up!" he urged Kyo on.

"How the hell am I supposed to go fast with your twig-like legs?" Kyo growled.

"Well I'm managing just fine with the sticks you call arms!" Haru retorted as he grabbed the jagged edge of a rock to help pull himself up the steadily increasing slope.

"They are not sticks! I work out every day!" Kyo insisted, feeling Haru's black side take over. "I am strong! I'm physically powerful! Well built and muscular! I'm buff! I am – waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

"KYO!" Haru turned around and his eyes widened as he watch the boy slip and begin to fall. Just at the last moment, his ankle got caught between two rocks and saved him.

Haru smirked at Kyo who was now hanging upside down. "Here, I'll help." Haru grabbed Kyo's ankle and began to drag him up the rest of the mountain.

"HEY! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? STOP! LET ME UP!"

"Hahaha, look who's the strong one now!"

"THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE IN MY BODY YOU BAKA!"

"…oh… right…"

It certainly was becoming confusing.

----------------------

"Whoa." Kyo breathed as he stared at the opening in the side of the mountain. "Are you sure it's in here?"

"Well, that's what the map seems to indicate, the first mountain we come to, and the first cave near the top."

The two boys looked at each other a little nervously before they began taking small hesitant steps into the cave.

The moment he entered, Kyo felt a prickling of unusual energy in the air. It tickled his skin as if there were a thousand ants marching up and down.

"Do you feel that?" he asked Haru.

"Yeah, I do."

"Be careful," Kyo told him.

"Be careful? Why are _you_ telling _me _to be careful?" Haru grumbled but stopped as he saw something up ahead. "Huh…what's that glowing blue light?"

Unconsciously Kyo reached out and put a hand on the other boy's arm, holding him back, almost in a protective way, but his hand dropped in surprise a moment later as the scene came into view.

His eyes were immediately drawn to a sparkling, glistening, shimmering bluey-silvery liquid that seemed to form a sort of pond, right there, in the depth of the cave in the mountain. The sparkling water seemed to be emitting some kind of bluish light that illuminated the entire area.

"Wow," was all Haru could say.

Kyo moved forward, wanting to touch it….needing to… he had never seen anything so dazzling in his entire life….he almost couldn't help himself…it was pulling him in….

"Kyo!" he heard Haru shout. "Get away from there!" But he kept on moving closer…. closer….

He stood right by the edge of the pool now, and reached out, practically in a trance. Haru had come up next to him but now he couldn't seem to stop staring into it either. As his hand drew closer and closer towards touching that shimmering substance, the feeling of something…_magical _in the air intensified. Just as the tips of his fingers were about to graze the surface, something moved underneath and Kyo leapt back in fright.

"If you were wise, you wouldn't touch that liquid," a female voice informed them pleasantly. "But then…how many of the people who come here could actually be called _wise_?" she laughed, a light, tinkling, musical sound which echoed around the cave.

Kyo and Haru looked around frantically for the source of the voice and they couldn't see anyone. Then they looked back to the pound…

They gasped, as the substance in the pond began to rise up, forming into the shape of a person as it grew. Finally, the figure stepped out of the pool and the shimmering liquid transformed into a sparkling dust, which fell gracefully to the ground and revealed….

"It's her!" Haru gasped, pointing an accusing finger at the figure.

She was a beautiful girl with flowing hair that seemed to go on forever. Looking at her hair, one moment it seemed to be a deep green, another moment it seemed to be blue. Her eyes were a shimmering silver and blue and they looked as if they were always swirling, gently moving - just like water.

"What _are _you?" Kyo couldn't help blurting out in amazement.

The girl laughed. "Well, I can't tell you that now can I. But why don't you boy's tell me you're wishes and I'll see what I can do."

"Our wishes? Our wishes are to be back in our own bodies!" Kyo exclaimed. "You don't know how much trauma your stupid magic had inflicted on us ever since we bumped into you and got that liquid spilt over us."

The girl blinked and then stared at them for a second.

"Oh!" Rapidly she bowed down in apology. "Gomen nasai! Gomen nasai! I'm so sorry! Yes, I remember that day…I hadn't realised so much of the liquid I had been carrying had spilt over you're bodies. See, just a sprinkle won't have an effect, it must have been quite a lot, and I hadn't realise….i thought it was okay….gomen!"

Haru huffed. "What is the meaning of all this anyways?"

"Ah…" she hesitated, then she smiled. "Well I guess there's no harm in telling you…you deserve an explanation. You see I have to power to grant wishes. It's all very complicated as to how I came to be like this and I most definitely can't impart those secrets to you, but the point is, if someone has a wish they really want to make, they come and see me. Now, I can't tell you exactly what I am, but, one condition of my powers means that I cannot travel out of this cave for a very long time at all…if I spend too much time away from this unique place, I will disappear into non-existence forever."

A sad faraway look appeared in her eyes. "Do you have any idea what it's like to feel trapped? To never be able to leave a place for a substantial amount of time? To never be allowed a _real _life? That's what it's like for me. There was a time…long again, when I did have a normal life…once, I had hopes and dreams and…. well, there's no need to tell you all about that. But the point is, the only way I stop myself from going completely insane is by having a few days experiencing _life _even if it is someone else's."

Haru and Kyo stared at her, not quite understanding, but not sure they were liking what they were hearing either.

"Ah, boys! Stop looking so bemused! What I'm saying is that, in exchange for granting a wish to whom ever asks, the person then agrees to allow me to take over their body for three days and three nights. All I have to do is sprinkle this liquid over our bodies and we switch places. During that time, they stay here, in this cave, but I put them in a special kind of sleep, so that they wake up in three days without even having been aware of time moving. I then grant their wish and they can return to their normal lives, while I have had the pleasure of experiencing _life_ for a short while. That day when I bumped into you two, I was on a mission to complete on of my clients wishes!" She beamed at them, her teeth glistening almost blinding white.

"Yes, quite a touching tale really. A mother had come to see me. She had a little daughter, but they forever fought and didn't get on well at all. She said it pained her that this was always happening and her daughter always seemed to be depressed and she didn't know how to communicate with her or help her. She said it had been so long since she had been that age that she was afraid she couldn't even remember what it was alike to be young, she was afraid she was so far away that she couldn't even help her daughter and that a gap would continue to grow between them. She wished that she could see things from her daughter's point of view in hope that she may understand her better, and that perhaps her daughter could see things from her point of view too, because she believed that was the key to resolving all conflicts, to understand each other and gain acceptance even if they don't necessarily agree with the others perspectives. So, I was on my way to visit her daughter and sprinkle my magic over her so that they would switch bodies for a week. I was rushing and didn't see you two, so intent was I on hurrying because if I spent too long away from my cave, I would disappear and become nothing." A glistening tear slipped down her cheek.

Kyo and Haru just stared at her for a moment. Kyo couldn't help but wonder, sincere as the mothers intentions had been, how well would her daughter have handled waking up one fine morning to find herself as her mother? No matter how he looked at it, it all seemed just a bit too messed up for him.

"Well boys, again, I'm so sorry for the mix-up! But, it can't have been all bad now could it? My magic is good magic….I have helped improve countless number of people's lives. Can't you say it has changed your life for the better? You've only got one day left before the magic should wear off; you really didn't need to come here. After tomorrow, you'll be back to your own selves!"

"NO." Kyo said very firmly. "I can't stand this any longer, I want…no, I _need _to be back in my own body now!" This girl was making him edgy, and he just knew he didn't want this weirdness to go on for even a _second _longer than it had to. "What could be good about being trapped in a dumb cow's body?" he exclaimed, though he couldn't help flinching slightly at the nasty words.

"Well it's better than being trapped inside a weak little kitten's body!" Haru snarled.

"Oh dear! I can see you two boys still have a bit to work on in you're relationship." The girl laughed again, looking quite delighted.

_Relationship? What the hell is she calling a relationship! _Kyo thought angrily.

"Lady, just switch us back already." Haru demanded.

"Okay, Okay, I can do that easily. But before I do, come on, think about this longer…this opportunity that you've had isn't one that comes by often, or comes to many people. Are you absolutely sure you want to go back to yourselves right now or would you rather have one more day?"

"Now." They both said in unison.

* * *

next chapter coming soon :D 


	9. Chapter 9

_A/N: Thank you to everyone who has left me such lovely reviews : ) _

_I never realised that the story the girl told in my last chapter was similar to Freaky Friday as I have not seen that movie, maybe I should watch it now:p _

_Hope you will all enjoy this new chapter!_

* * *

**Chapter 9**

"OMG I can't believe it!"

Kyo jumped up and down in excitement, pausing only to look down at himself and check that it was still true. "I'm myself again!"

_I never thought I would be so happy to say that! _Kyo mused after he had calmed down a bit._ But really…it's such a relief to not have to deal with all those other thoughts and feelings…_ _Finally, can things be simple again? Simple is good. I can deal with simple. _

Haru looked relieved as well. "Come on Kyo," he said, a little scared that the neko was smiling so much…he had the feeling that things weren't just going to just fall back in place so easily. "We better get going, we still have to walk all the way back."

Kyo blinked. "Ah! Right."

After saying goodbye to the mysterious girl, they made their way back down the mountain but the trip down was characterised by a stark difference to their journey on the way up – they had been arguing before, and now, a heavy silence fell upon them. As they continued the journey home Kyo felt the silence weighing down on him…he couldn't help the feeling that it stood for that fact that…

_There's something missing…there's something missing! _His mind began to whirl in confusion and the awkward lack of communication between him and Haru began to panic Kyo though he didn't know why and that confused him more. _I have to…I have to say something…what do I say? Oh god…I can't think of a thing to say…this is so weird…why do I feel like I have to say something? I thought things were going to be simple, I thought…! Why am I getting panicked! Is their something wrong with me? Why is this feeling welling up inside of me…I shouldn't be like this…I should be fine…I…I…why do I..._

Kyo sank to the ground on his hands and knees.

"Kyo?!" Haru asked in alarm, dashing over to his side.

"Why…why do I feel so….empty all of a sudden?" he sounded lost.

_Empty…that's what it is…_

Haru let out a little sigh and sat down next to Kyo. "It does feel strange." He admitted.

Kyo blinked and felt his head clear a little…that tightening panic ease…

Neither said anything for another few moments, and then Haru, seeming to realise the need to break the silence, spoke again. "Kyo, I want you to know that…."

_How do I say this? While things might not have appeared to change on the surface…after this…all that has happened over the last few days… I know things have changed, at least for me…and even if he doesn't feel the same way, I want him to know…_

"I…after what happened, I think…I understand why you want to defeat Yuki so badly, why you put so much energy into it. I think I also learnt more about you…I… just want you to know that I'm sorry for some of the things I may have said to you in the past and that…" Haru trailed off as he got lost in the thoughts he wished he could say but knew it was too soon.

In the silence on the way down the mountain, and with only his thoughts and memories in his head, he had had enough time to come to some startlingly clear realisations. For Haru, it was often that way…when he least suspected it, something that had been bothering him, or a feeling that he couldn't explain and had been nagging at the corner of his mind, would suddenly become startlingly clear, and he would understand why it was there, or what it meant…at least he understood it in his head, but expressing it or knowing what to do about it was another task altogether.

_I want to be here for you now…_Haru wished he could tell Kyo. _I know you don't consider me anything but an annoying person who turns black and attacks you every now and then…but I wish we could be more than that. Now…now that I've seen things through your eyes…I want to learn even more about you. I want to stay with you…protect you…be there with you when you feel there's no one else. I want to make you see that there _are _good things about the neko of the zodiac…_

Haru looked back up at Kyo who was looking surprised, but Haru was even more surprised when the fiery haired boy gave him a small smile. "Yeah…I…want you to know also that…. I understand now that you can't control you're black side…how difficult it is…"

They stared at each other.

_Things seem so different now…I used to just look at him and feel angry…but now…now I almost feel like he really does understand me…like no one else does or ever could…_

Haru's face seemed to be getting closer and closer…though Kyo didn't realise just _how _close until he felt soft lips brush against his. Kyo's eyes fluttered closed for just a second before realisation dawned and then –

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" He shouted shoving Haru roughly away.

Haru blinked, looking equally shocked. His cheeks flushed ever so slightly. "I…I'm sorry…I didn't mean to…"

----------------

They had been walking for ages, Haru following Kyo who now had the better sense of direction once more. _What was I thinking? _He wondered. _I don't know what came over me…I just felt him so near and…I couldn't stop myself…_

Meanwhile, Kyo had successfully managed to push that strange incident to the far, far corners of his mind. A mistake. Never happened, didn't mean anything. Haru had _not _almost kissed him. Ah, the wonderful world of denial.

_I kind of don't want to go back so soon, _Kyo thought as he looked down at the map. _Yeah, who needs the map? _He shoved it back into his pocket. _I don't care if we take a wrong turn…_

_I suddenly feel more at peace than I have in weeks…in months! For the first time in ages I don't feel like I'm in a small box with no room to move, no room to breath, no where to escape. Haru doesn't seem bothered being around me…and when I'm with him…for some reason I don't feel the same guilt I feel when I'm living with Tohru… I don't feel the same shame as seeing Yuki every day…maybe…we don't have to go back so soon? A few more days would be nice… _

Yes, Kyo felt better than he had felt for ages and it was too soon to go back to that trapped life…

-----------------------

"Tohru-kun, Tohru-kun please do stop waving your hands about in such a distressed manner!" Shigure chuckled.

"B-but Kyo-kun has been gone almost two whole days!"

"I wouldn't worry about that." Shigure smiled widely. "I'm sure he's just spending some _quality _time with Hatsuharu-san. If you know what I mean."

"Huh?"

"Hmm…well I guess you wouldn't."

-----------------------

"Let's stop here." Kyo sighed and sat down heavily, leaning his back against the nearest tree.

"Oh?" Haru plopped down next to him and watched as Kyo rustled around in his backpack for something to eat. "You were in such a hurry before. Now you don't seem to care how long it takes us to get back. The others must be starting to worry."

Kyo narrowed his eyes. "Why did you have to bring all that up?" he snapped.

"Huh…? What's bothering you, Kyo?"

"WHY DO YOU EVEN CARE?!" Kyo shouted.

It seemed like the neko was having yet another mood swing. He didn't like that he was still feeling weird…. now that he was in his own body, he should feel himself again right? But instead, he felt even stranger than before! He didn't like it, and part of him just wanted to make Haru get mad at him, turn black, like he used to, maybe then, this feeling would go away…

But instead of getting angry with him, Haru looked a little hurt. He reached out a hand and brushed it over Kyo's. It was a light touch, but it sent a strange shiver right up his arm and Kyo pulled away sharply, feeling heat rise to his face.

"Kyo…" Haru moved closer and grasped his arms to prevent him from moving back, demanding his attention. Kyo suddenly couldn't move, fixated by Haru's intense gaze.

_Haru…what are you doing? And why am I suddenly finding it so hard to breath?_

He waited, unmoving, for Haru to say something, anything.

"I thought that things had changed between us, Kyo." He said quietly, his voice completely serious. "I thought you understood that." _Why are you shouting at me when I only wanted to know what was wrong? _

Kyo stared back, holding his breath. Finally he looked down, exhaling shakily. "I'm sorry Haru. I know…. I know things have changed."

_Did I offend him? Have I insulted him? Why do I suddenly feel guilty?_

Haru smiled. "So, if there's something bothering you, you can tell me." _Because I want to know everything about you…I want to hear your pain so I can know how to take it away and make you smile… _

Haru blinked, still a little surprised at his own thoughts…but he couldn't help them, so he wouldn't fight them…he already accepted them.

Kyo moved away from him and felt his breathing go back to normal. _Shit…what just happened? _

---------------------

"Nnn." Kyo groaned as he felt the early morning sun warm his skin. _No, it's morning…that means another day of walking…that means, by the end of today, we should be back…_

He opened his eyes. _I don't want to go back. It's not just because I feel like I don't belong there, I think it's also because…I want to stay alone with Haru…_

Kyo squeezed his eyes tightly shut again. _What the hell am I thinking? I can't even control my own thoughts anymore! This is that stupid cow's entire fault… _

_But still I…I don't want to go back just yet…maybe I can just sleep a little longer…put it off for a little longer…_

--------------------

"Kyo?" Haru said, sitting up. He was surprised to see the red haired boy still sleeping, after the last two mornings had seen him always awake and ready, demanding that Haru hurry up.

_I better wake him up or he might get angry with me for letting him sleep…_Haru thought a bit regretfully.

"Kyo!" He said loudly. "KYO wake up, we have to get moving."

The boy didn't move.

"Kyo?" Haru moved closer and nudged him gently, then again, more roughly, still his eyes did not open.

"KYO…"

_Haru is calling me…_ Kyo thought. _I don't want to go…I'll just pretend to be asleep, maybe he will give up and go back to sleep as well. _

"Kyo!" Haru was leaning over him now and raised his hand ready to wack the boy over the head, though he wasn't sure if even _that _would wake him.

But as he stared down at Kyo something made him stop…

Kyo's face was relaxed and almost peaceful, something Haru rarely saw. His fiery hair was tousled and fell about his face becomingly, his long, dark eyelashes rested gently against his cheeks. He lay on his side, both hands almost…but not quite, tucked beneath his chin in a way that made him look so….

_So cute! _Haru thought. _Kyo-chan looks so cute when he's asleep!_

Unable to stop himself, he reached down and brushed a lock of hair from the 'sleeping' boy's eyes. _No…not just when he's asleep…Kyo looks cute all the time… _

Kyo's eyes almost flew open in surprise at the contact. _Someone…no, not anyone – _Haru-_ is touching me… _he managed to keep his face relaxed and tried to look asleep as he felt Haru's fingers brush his face.

_What the hell is he doing? Why won't he leave me alone? _

Almost without thinking, Haru continued to brush his fingertip against Kyo's soft skin. He caressed the boy's cheek and continued to trail his fingers down his face stopping to trace his lips.

_So soft…_Haru thought foggily. _His lips are so soft…maybe, all he needs to wake him up is…_

_Ba-dump ba-dump ba-dump_

Kyo's felt his heart beginning to beat faster and faster. _What is that baka doing? I should have quit pretending long ago, but somehow I can't…I can't move! _

_What is Haru doing? I'm too scared now to open my eyes…but I have to…this is scaring me it's like he's about to -_

_I want to kiss him…_Haru thought, and it was all he could think. He leaned down until his lips were just a fraction above Kyo's and –

Kyo's eyes snapped open.


	10. Chapter 10

_**Previously:** Kyo and Haru returned to their own bodies, but it seems things aren't just going to go back to the way they were before._ _Haru especially seems to have new ideas... a while later_,_ thinking Kyo was asleep_,_ Haru was just about to get his chance to kiss the neko when Kyo opened his eyes at the last moment…_

_And now: _

_Another chapter for my lovely readers : )_

* * *

**Chapter 10**

They stared at each other.

_Too close! _Kyo's mind screamed. A thousand little alarm bells seemed to be ringing in his head._ This is too close! Get him away from you! Get him away from you! _

He reached up and shoved Haru hard.

"What the hell are you doing?" he asked when he managed to catch his breath.

Haru blushed ever so slightly. "I….you wouldn't wake up."

"…….."

"I was going to slap you until you woke up."

_Slap me? _Kyo just looked at him. _You were touching me…gently…_

WHATEVER!" he burst out. "Let's just get going."

Haru sighed as Kyo stormed off, and began to follow him.

_I've just realised how strong these new feelings I am having towards Kyo…or maybe they are feelings that have always been there but are only just beginning to bloom…_

At any rate, he knew one thing that was blindingly obvious… Kyo wouldn't accept them.

_So I have to suppress my feelings…I don't want to push him away again…_

_----------------_

"Kyo are you sure we're going the right way? It's almost nightfall, we should be back by now."

"Shut up you stupid directionally challenged cow. What makes _you _think you have any idea about the right way to go?"

"But you haven't even been looking at the map!"

"I DON'T NEED TO LOOK AT THE STUPID MAP!!!"

Haru narrowed his eyes.

There was a blur of movement and then –

Kyo found himself pinned against a tree, Haru's lips covering his own.

Unable to control it, his body reacted instantly, and he went weak as a tingling warmth like nothing he had ever felt before washed through him.

_Shit, did I make him go black just like that? _Kyo wondered as he raised his arms trying to push Haru away. _This is gross…this is…wrong! Why do I feel so weak…_

Kyo couldn't quite comprehend why this was happening, but even worse, he couldn't understand why his body was responding. Against his will he began to kiss Haru back and as soon as he did he completely forgot what was really happening, all he knew was that it felt great and he wanted more… when the black and white haired boy slipped his tongue into Kyo's mouth, he responded with equal passion, feeling tingles from his head to his toes.

When Haru finally pulled back his eyes had turned the colour of obsidian. Kyo watched breathlessly as they gradually faded to his normal grey.

"What was that for?!"

Haru blinked. "You…."

Kyo growled, trying to sound as angry as he knew he should be, but it was hard when he still felt dizzy and drained of strength…

Haru shook his head slightly to himself, seemingly snapping out of his own surprised condition. A slow grin spread over his face. "I don't like you shouting at me. From now on, whenever you get angry at me, that's what I'm going to do."

Kyo was speechless.

Haru's grin widened. "What? Cat got your tongue? Ha ha ha."

Kyo clenched his jaw and spun around trying to get away from Haru, his mind so full of jumbled thoughts that he still couldn't speak.

_What is the meaning of this? Why is Haru acting like…acting like he LIKES me all of a sudden? I mean, I know we understand each other a little better now but…but he could never actually want to get any closer to me…he could never like me in that way…_

_Why am I thinking this like I want it…_

_That kiss was disgusting! Haru is disgusting…he can't be interested in me in that way…it's all a game to him…and…and… _

_HOW DARE HE VIOLATE MY LIPS!_

So why didn't Kyo run away? Why did he want to stay here with Haru, why was a small part of him wishing Haru would kiss him again? Why did a small part of him want to see just how far Haru would go?

"I don't have time for your stupid games," he muttered, trying to keep calm.

"Who said anything about games?" Haru replied happily as he followed Kyo. "We're definitely not going the right way, but I know it's just because you want to spend more time with me."

"STOP SAYING SUCH DUMB THINGS YOU STUPID COW!"

--------------------

Kyo stared at the ground as he walked. It had happened again, Haru had kissed him again. _How can I let him get away with playing with me like this? _Kyo thought, frustrated with himself. But when Haru did those things to him…he didn't have the strength to stop him…

He felt bad for shouting at Haru all of a sudden, especially calling him stupid. He remembered the way the teachers and fellow students had treated him, remembered the feelings Haru had felt…the feelings he had experienced too.

_I never want to be the one responsible for causing feelings like that…_ Kyo thought guiltily. But, now that Haru had started acting all…weird…. the only thing he could think of was trying to act how he always had acted, before all this happened. 

_It's not entirely Haru's fault…because I'm acting different as well. I …feel… different… I'm beginning to realise that things really could never go back to the way they were._

Kyo was acutely aware of Haru's presence as he walked side by side with him, also staring at the ground. Just feeling Haru that close… it was making Kyo's heart beat just a little faster…it made him feel nervous but at the same time for some strange reason it was comforting. He was glad Haru was there…for the first time in a long time, even when he was around other people…he didn't feel alone.

_If it wasn't just a game that Haru's playing 'cos he's weird and bored, _Kyo dared to hope, _would it really be so bad? These feelings that I'm starting to feel, are they really so wrong? Kissing a guy…could it ever mean something? _

"Hey, Kyo look!" Haru announced suddenly, pointing to their left. "It's a lake! Let's take a dip."

"Wha- He-Hey! Haru!" Kyo protested as the younger boy grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him towards the water.

"We don't have time for this…" the neko said half-heartedly because he knew that really he had been delaying returning anyway. His eyes widened when Haru began to take off his shirt.

"Put your shirt back on you stupid cow," Kyo muttered as he quickly turned around to hide his blush. _What are you saying? _He asked himself. _You've seen him without his shirt many times…_

"Come on Kyo, it will be nice." Haru came up behind him and started to tug at his shirt.

"Get off me!"

Kyo yelped as he suddenly found himself minus one shirt. "Hey! HEY!" he shouted as an arm snaked around his middle and began tugging him towards the clear, tranquil lake. "I HATE WATER YOU BAKA!"

_**SPLASH!**_

Kyo came to the surface spluttering and gasping at the shock of the ice- cold water. _Why that little – he really did it! He tossed me in the lake, I can't let him get away with this! _

Kyo flapped his arms about frantically as he felt himself sinking. He had never been good with water.

"HARU!" He glared, as he looked around for the ox. "HA – "

He broke off when he saw a dark shadow lurking beneath the surface.

"Ha…Haru, is that you?" He asked, a little fear sneaking into his voice.

The music from _Jaws _began to play in his mind.

_Shut up! _He told it. _I'm in a lake, there are no sharks here…_

"WHAAAAA!" Kyo shouted in fright as something came erupting out of the water two centimetres away from his face.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

Kyo's scream echoed through the woods.

Then all that could be heard was laughter.

Haru's laughter.

"HAHAHAHAHAH!" Haru laughed as he grabbed Kyo by the arms, trying to calm the neko down. "Kyo, haha, it's me. That serves you right when you scared the hell out of me with that little trick you played in the cave! You should have seen it coming, hahahah!"

For a moment Kyo went completely still in Haru's arms and all he could do was stare at Haru's laughing face, twinkling eyes and bright smile.

_I've hardly ever seen Haru smile like that…_Kyo thought, spellbound. It was true, he had only really seen Haru angry, or showing no emotion. But now…he seemed so playful…so happy…Kyo felt a foreign warmth flood through him. _I wish I could see him like this more often – _

_Wait, what am I thinking? _

"LET ME GO!" Kyo shouted making Haru pull back and cover his ears in pain at facing Kyo's anger waves up so close.

Kyo shoved Haru angrily, causing a huge splash and tried to paddle back towards land. "I hate water!" He exclaimed. "And annoying cows!"

Kyo splashed harder, wondering why the land didn't seem to be getting any nearer.

"Kyo, I'm holding onto your pants."

"Eh?"

Kyo looked down to see Haru's hand holding on to the loop of his pants, near his waist. _It's a good thing I brought a change of clothes, _Kyo thought absently, annoyed that his pants were now soaking. His mind abruptly went blank as he turned around and looked at Haru who was moving even closer towards him with a sudden glint in his eyes that Kyo had come to learn usually meant…

"How many times did you shout at me in the last five minutes?" Haru asked. "Let's see, it had to have been at least three times, that means I owe you three kisses, though if you would like to request more, I'm sure that won't be a problem…"

"Enough with this you hentai!" Kyo exclaimed, though a little shakily.

Haru kept advancing.

Kyo began to back away as best as he could in the water. He hit the banks of one edge of the river with a start, and in the next instance, Haru pulled him up out of the water and was on him, kissing him.

"I thought I could do it, I thought I could, but I can't!" Haru gasped breathlessly as he pulled back from the kiss.

"H-Haru." Kyo was all too aware of Haru pressing into him and he was fighting hard to stop his body from responding, while part of his mind was telling him to escape, but another part was screaming at Haru for stopping the kiss.

"I had no intention of showing you these feelings I seem to have developed for you," Haru told him as he leant back down and kissed his neck, his voice turning to a muffled whisper. "I was going to suppress them because you don't seem to be welcoming my advances but…."

"Nnnn…." _What is he talking about…is this still part of his little game, part (a) scare Kyo, part (b), confuse Kyo?_

Kyo narrowed his eyes, trying to get a grip of reality again. _Yuki, Haru's only interested in Yuki this way. _

"Why don't you save this stuff for someone who wants it! Like Yuki!" Kyo snapped.

"Yuki doesn't want it." Haru said simply, not even looking sad.

"WELL I DON'T WANT IT EITHER!" Kyo shouted trying to stop tears of frustration and confusion springing to his eyes.

Now Haru looked sad. "Well, I realise that but…" he shrugged. "Now that you know, I can't take it back…" he smiled. "I guess I'll just have to seduce you Kyo."


	11. Chapter 11

_**A/N: **__to my readers, sorry its been a while since my last update, unfortunately I have become very busy again but I will continue to try my best not to leave it too long between updates :)__ and this chapter I have made a little longer than usual. Hope you enjoy. _

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_**Chapter 11**_Seduce me…?!?!?! That dumb cow thinks he's going to seduce me?_

Kyo huffed as he continued to pretend he was walking back to Shigure's when really he didn't even know where he was going and couldn't really care. _Just what does he mean by that?? He can't really be…serious…can he? _He felt a nervous flutter in his stomach. _No, no, this is no good…if he tries that…I don't know how I'll react… I don't want to know…_

_How did this turn into some kind of game? I'd rather be fighting him…_

_But somehow that seems wrong now._

Haru trotted up happily to his side, his hair still damp and sticking out in all different directions.

Kyo looked at him in annoyance. "Stop walking so _closely._" He growled. How was he supposed to think with Haru so near?

Haru smiled. "But I want to be close to you."

Feeling a little silly, Kyo took a large step to the side, then another so that they were walking with a few metres between them. "Just stay there for a while, please? I kind of need some time to think."

Haru looked at him with an unreadable expression but then shrugged and didn't try to move closer again. Kyo returned to his thinking.

_What if…what if, when Haru tries to kiss me again (if he tries) I don't resist? _Kyo wondered. _So I felt something…attraction when he did it before…Does this mean I like Haru? He keeps wanting to kiss me…so that can only mean he's attracted to me too right? I mean if he wanted to just annoy me or play with me he would provoke me and get me angry so I would fight him right? But…he hasn't tried to do that once since we changed back… _

_-------------_

Night fell, yet again.

Kyo was sleeping now, and Haru was watching him.

He had to pretend be asleep before he could get this opportunity. Kyo had suddenly decided that it was too dangerous to sleep near Haru. He told Haru to go somewhere out of his sight, so that he could sleep, so Haru, reluctantly had complied. He smiled as he remembered how only a few moments later Kyo had called out to him, trying to mask the slight fear in his voice.

"Haru…I'm sorry… you can come back…"

_He doesn't want to be alone…_Haru thought. _I don't want you to be alone either, Kyo. _

Kyo, however, had made it obvious he didn't trust Haru not "to try to kiss him or something." The neko had blushed but then told Haru not to face him, and to go to sleep. Haru could tell that Kyo planned to wait until Haru fell asleep before he too succumbed to it. So he turned to face his back to Kyo, closed his eyes, and waited.

It seemed forever, until the neko's breathing evened out and told Haru he was asleep. Then he turned back over, and now, by the light of the fire he watched Kyo.

_Would he wake if I touched him now…if I ran my hand through his hair to see if its as silky as it looks, if I pressed my lips to his so that I can remember their softness?_

_Could I wrap my arms around him now, and hold him close without him waking and pulling away? _

Haru sighed. He really felt like he had learnt a lot more about Kyo in the last few days, though his attraction to him had always been there…now, there was something else which was making the attraction so many times stronger. Now, he also realised that Kyo needed someone…someone to understand him, someone to look out for him too…and Haru, knowing this, couldn't just forget about it…now, he wanted Kyo with a fierce passion that told him to simply take the him, keep him forever, do what he must, just to show Kyo, that he doesn't have to be alone… at the same time, he desperately wanted Kyo to be the one who would accept him.

_I think…Kyo and I are perfect for each other…I think…that some people are just meant to be together…and it's taken too long for me to realise this!_

_I hope Kyo realises it soon too… _

_I can't wait for the day when I can hold him without him pushing me away! I can't wait for the day when I wake every morning to see him by my side,, smiling at me…happy to be with me…_

_But what if he keeps denying it?_

Haru was well aware that they should be back by now, and he knew Kyo hadn't bothered to look at the map. Kyo didn't seem at all worried, and so Haru knew, that the neko was delaying going back. He was very happy about that, it gave him hope…_that MUST mean Kyo at least likes me right? _

"Haru……."

He gave a start at the mumbled word from Kyo's lips as he thought the neko might have woken up. He was still fast asleep though.

Haru felt his heart swell. _Say it again…please…say my name one more time…_

"….Haru…." Kyo mumbled again, almost as if hearing those thoughts.

Feeling a suddenly overwhelming wave of affection Haru couldn't stop himself from moving closer to Kyo pulling him into his arms. Only then did Haru close his eyes and fall asleep.

-------------

Kyo was dreaming. One of those kind of abstract dreams where the images and shapes were hazy, but the feelings and knowledge of what was going on was crystal clear.

_Home?_

_No. _

_Not Home. _

_There…returning there…after school, everyday after school, go back there…_

_Don't want to go…_

_A happy family…a happy home?_

_No…no… it's not right…belong on my own…I belong…on my own, it's better that way…_

_They don't understand me…they couldn't understand…_

_Not even her, not even though she tries…I'm sorry…_

_There's no reason to go back there…there's nothing that makes me want to be there…there's nothing in my life that makes me want to stay…_

_But the feet are still moving. _

_They are still moving! _

_Up the pathway, closer and closer to the door…_

_Why, faster? Why…why is there anticipation…hope, instead of weary dread? _

_The heart is beating faster the heart is beating faster because the heart knows…_

_Hand reaching out for the door handle…_

_The door opening before it reaches – _

_Shock! Surprise! But then…warmth…_

_Haru!_

"_Kyo, it's about time _you_ got here, I've been waiting for _you _for ages!" _

_Smiles. _

_Thump thump thump…_

_The heart knows…the heart knows it knows!_

_There is a reason to stay now…_

_-----------------------------_

Haru woke up at sunrise and reluctantly moved away from Kyo, putting some distance between them.

Kyo woke shortly after as the air around him suddenly grew cold…

_But I felt so warm…what was that dream? I can't remember it…but, I felt so warm…_

Kyo looked over at a 'sleeping' Haru. _Please don't let it be a game…please, let it be more than that! _He found himself silently praying.

Kyo frowned, but he tried to work out why he was really thinking that…the answer was there as it had been for a while…

_Because…I…I really like Haru…_

_------------------_

'Like' turned to 'want' and 'need' when Haru was awake and around Kyo…all the time, everywhere, so near, too near! No other person had ever made him react so strongly before, Kyo hardly knew what to do or how to control it and Haru began to consume his every thought.

_You want him too, you know you do! _A sinister part of his mind, a part that didn't care about his own emotions, the risk of getting hurt, the consequences if Haru didn't really feel the same way…if he was just playing a game, or if he simply pitied Kyo…this part of him said who cares about this or that….two young, healthy, energetic boys left alone in the woods! Time for some…action?

He wanted Haru. _Oh god…I want him too. Wait…no I don't! _Kyo started at his sudden thought that had been clearer than any of his other thoughts for a long time…the notion that he wanted Haru…he wanted to stay with Haru, and he wanted to be with Haru…and he wanted to…

_No, I don't want him! _He tried to block out those thoughts in his mind. But the ones rooting for Haru were so strong.

_If you don't want him, why are you secretly wishing…waiting…hoping… for him to kiss you again?_

_I am not! I am not! I don't want him to kiss me because it was gross! Yeah…and…and I'm defiantly not wishing or waiting or hoping!_

_Grr, how dare Haru do this to me! _

_Thinks he can just play around with me! _

_I'll show him just who is in control now!_

Spinning to face him, all it took was one step and Kyo was but a breath away from Haru.

"Kiss me." He demanded and when Haru just stood there looking stunned, Kyo 'took control' and made the move. However he didn't stay in control for long….

The second their lips touched a fire flared between them. Haru got over his shock and slipped his arms around Kyo's waist, pulling him sharply against his body while moving backwards until Kyo felt the nearest tree against his back.

Kyo was so preoccupied with the feeling of Haru's hot tongue plundering into his mouth, probing and stroking his own that he didn't notice Haru nudging his legs apart until he felt his hard member pressed intimately against his own.

Kyo instantly went still. Haru pulled back slightly and almost laughed out loud at the expression of utter shock on the neko's face. _Well what does he expect when he's turning me on like this? _

Kyo saw the wicked glint in Haru's eyes a second before the other boy tilted his hips and thrust himself against Kyo while drawing him back and kissing him so hard he completely took away his breath.

For a moment the whole world seemed to spin as Kyo felt himself stiffen painfully. He pulled back and gasped, alarm bells going off in his head. Almost before he was aware of what he was doing, he shoved Haru off him. Haru fell to the ground landing on his back and looked up at Kyo in a mixture of surprise and anticipation.

Kyo stared down at him his chest rising and falling, his face flushed, his lips swollen. Part of him wanted to collapse on top of Haru and grind himself against him in a frenzy, kiss him again and again until they both couldn't breath …

But another part of him….a part that was stronger and was afraid, controlled his legs and it told him to run.

So he did.

------------------------------

Haru stared up at the sky for a few moments blinking. Had Kyo really just run off?

He sat up. "That wasn't supposed to happen."

No. Once Kyo had realised that things had changed between them for the better…once Kyo had responded to the kiss…

_And he most certainly wanted it…_ Haru thought.

Then Kyo was supposed to stay. Stay and continue wonderful things…

Haru shook his head slightly. He was still a little shocked over how fast his feelings seemed to have changed, though perhaps that was expected of feelings that had been there all along, and were finally allowed to burst free…with such force it was hard, practically impossible to handle….

_Still, Kyo must be finding it a shock. Not sure how to act and react, _Haru thought and he got up to set things right and show Kyo just how he was supposed to act now.

------------------------

"KYO???"

Kyo stopped running at the sound of Haru's voice. "Why the hell am I running from Haru like some kind of coward?" He muttered out loud.

"Here kitty….kyo-neko chan I'll find you soon…." There was laughter that sounded very much like black Haru!

Kyo stiffened and was unable to stop his legs from moving once more.

-------------------------

_How long have I been running since I haven't heard Haru's voice?_

Kyo stopped, suddenly worried.

_Oh god, what am I doing, I can't leave Haru alone; he'll get completely lost!_

_But he deserves it, making me feel this way with no warning! _

Still, a wave of guilt crashed over him and Kyo turned around.

Only to come face to face with Haru.

Black Haru.

Before Kyo could flee once more, Haru grabbed him, gripping him firmly.

"Well, that was a nice little run through the woods, kitten." He smirked. "But now I'm hornier than hell." He's hand captured Kyo's and brought it down to the bulge in his pants, watching Kyo's eyes become huge.

"See what I mean? Hahaha."

Kyo swallowed nervously and tried to pull away but only succeeded in stroking Haru instead.

Haru groaned wanting to get closer, to feel Kyo touching him more. His eyes shimmered going darker then lighter then darker again as he struggled with his different sides."Please…" he said hoarsely, though he hated to beg. "Don't go. I need you now…"

Kyo blinked rapidly. _Need me now? What does that mean…what does…oh god… …why do I suddenly feel so hot…oh god…I'm becoming hard again…is this…is this okay? Ahhh I can't think properly, why am I trembling and shaking so much? Why can't I control myself? Why can't I control my thoughts? _

"FINE!!!!!!!!" Kyo screamed as much to block out his own thoughts and because of his frustration towards Haru for confusing him and making him feel this way.

"Fine." He said with more determination. "Take me now, do what you want, I don't care!"

"Okay!" Haru agreed his hands going for Kyo's pants.

"Ah….wait!!! Wait!!!" Kyo said in a panic. "What are you doing…that was a-a-a joke!!! I didn't really mean it….it was a joke!" He turned and twisted and ran off once more.

Haru sighed turning fully white again and let him go. He was beginning to realise that even though they now understood many things about each other better since they had seen the world from each other's eyes, there was still much they didn't understand.

But Haru wouldn't give up. He would keep on trying because he knew what his heart felt was true.

_--------------------_

_That was stupid. _Kyo told himself. _Why did you do that? Maybe now Haru will give up on you and…_

_And I don't want that. _

_Just when I feel like I had a chance with him…just when it seemed it could be real…what if I've pushed him too far…why did I run away again? _

But Kyo knew why. He was scared. He couldn't put a name to exactly why he was scared, though he knew if he analysed it enough he could come up with lots of reasons.

But the fact was still the same…his fear and unsureness overwhelmed everything else and stopped him from taking chances.

_I have to…I have to overcome this fear…Haru…he wouldn't use me just for sexual satisfaction would he?_

Kyo closed his eyes and remembered…

He remembered those feelings he had experience whilst in Haru's body whenever Haru thought about Momiji or Yuki or Kisa.

_He loved them and wanted to protect them…he's a good person Haru._

Recalling this feeling, Kyo felt a rush of warmth flood his body. His hearth thumped louder in his chest though he wasn't quite sure why. All he knew was he had to take a chance. He would go back to Haru, and this time, he wouldn't leave him.

-------------------

Haru wandered about in the other direction. It was probably a good thing Kyo had run away from him.

_I don't know what I was thinking; I've never acted so…I never would have pushed myself on him like that but…_

But Haru was finding it more and more difficult to control himself around Kyo.

And when had all this developed? In two three days? Would it continue to get worse and worse?

Haru shrugged to himself. For now, maybe it was best, even if he did get lost, that he got as far away from Kyo as he possibly could…. though each step he took was agony, his body screaming at him to turn and claim his kitten like he wanted to…

The ground trembled beneath his feet, perhaps trembling with the same effort as Haru was –

Hang on.

Haru paused. The ground shook even more noticeably this time and the earth itself seemed to groan.

He looked up and had a second to think _shit, a landslide! _Before piles of heavy earth came thumping down on him.

He felt it like a weight hitting his head and knocking him to his feet before he could even think of escape. As he struggled to breathe all his strength was taken from him, each pile seeming like another thump, winding him more.

_Kyo…_Haru thought desperately, and then everything went black.


	12. Chapter 12

_A/N: To everyone who has been waiting a very long time for an update, I am soooo sorry! my deepest apologies! I know how annoying it can be having to wait so long inbetween chapters, now that I'm finally able to update, I decided to do the last few chapters all at once so no one will have to wait to find out the rest of the story : D_

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**Chapter 12**

"Haru…?"

Kyo headed back in the direction he had left Haru, suddenly feeling quite nervous.

_He couldn't have gone far…where is he!_

"Haru?!" Kyo called again, a little more urgently, feeling impatient.

_Any moment now…any moment and he will come creeping up from behind me, laughing at how I'm getting all worried…but even if he's laughing at me I don't mind…this time I'll welcome it! _

Abruptly Kyo froze in his tracks as he felt a chill creep up his spine.

_**Something is wrong! **_

"HARU!" Kyo began to run. "HARUUUUUUU!!"

_Answer me please! Please…Please be okay! _

Kyo skidded to a sudden halt and for a second it felt as if his heart stopped beating. There in the clearing was a large pile of rock, dirt and debris that hadn't been there before.

_Haru could be under there!_

"**Haru!**" Before even sparing a thought for his own safety, Kyo dashed over to the wreckage, sank to his knees and proceeded to frantically dig with his bare hands.

Another little voice in his mind told him he was being ridiculous, that there was no way Haru would have or could have become caught in a land slide, that he was probably going to step out from the trees behind him any second, laughing his head off and asking Kyo why he was digging in the dirt like a lunatic. Sure that image might be funny but… the very thought of Haru buried under the earth…probably unconscious…without air…unable to breath…

Frustrated tears sprung to his eyes as Kyo looked at the small pile of dirt he had managed to remove compared to the enormous pile looming before him. The process was too slow and he didn't know what else to do. Utter helplessness washed over him so intensely that he almost lost himself in it…

_Shouldn't I go get help? But there is no where close to get help…it would take too long, we're too far away from anyone…_

By the time Kyo dug Haru out by himself the ox would already have suffocated…

His life taken away…gone just like that…

_NO!!! _Kyo's mind protested as he dug faster, more frantically. _It's not time for him yet, he can't die like this…it's not right for someone with so much life ahead of him to have it snatched away so suddenly…_

_No…! He can't just leave when I'm only just beginning to get to really know him!_

_Haru… _

_What will I do if you are not around? _

That last thought struck him stronger than anything else. Against his will images flooded his mind…images of Haru.

Kyo had never realised before just how used he had become to seeing Haru almost everyday…

_He was always there…taunting me…annoying me…_

But somehow…he had never really minded…not like he had when others such as Yuki insulted him… when Haru insulted him…it always felt more like just teasing, and not something he really believed…And now, after the last few days spent together_…I feel closer to him that I've ever felt to anyone in my life…closer than I thought I could ever feel to another person_

Kyo was suddenly forced to picture a life without Haru in it.

_There would be nothing…_

_It would be so pointless…_

_Empty…_

Just when he had began to think he had something to hope for…

_A life without Haru…_

Why did that very thought suddenly make him feel that…_there would be nothing to live for anymore_…

Something inside Kyo seemed to snap.

"NO! HARU! YOU. CAN'T. LEAVE.ME.NOW!!!"

His hand brushed against something. _A leg…Haru's leg!_

With a strength and speed he never knew he was capable of, Kyo pulled Haru completely out from the rubble and dragged him to safety just before more earth gave way with a loud rumble.

Kyo had no time to feel relief. He looked down at Haru's still form and fear engulfed him. The rational part of his mind should have been telling him to check Haru's breathing and heart rate, yet in that instance he was so gripped with fear that the calm, rational kind of thinking needed to take over in times of danger was completely absent…

In that moment, he simply stared at Haru, half seeing him, half not, and his thoughts continued on with a will of their own…

_I shouldn't have run from him…_ _If only I had of stayed with him like I really wanted to! If only I hadn't let my pathetic fear control me…none of this would have happened…_

_If I wasn't so weak…_

_and now…_

_If he doesn't open his eyes…_

_The last thing he would have seen?…his last memory…?_

_It would have been me running away from him…!_

… _No! _

_How could I do this to him? What right did I have to treat him that way? I am completely worthless and yet I acted as if I am better than him…how could I be so selfish? How could I do that to Haru?_

More tears stung his eyes. _If Haru's ……it will be my fault…and I never would have gotten to tell him how much I do care for him…how much I was grateful to have him around…_

Kyo had grabbed one of Haru's hands and was squeezing it tightly…afraid to let go. _He doesn't look like he is breathing…he has to be breathing!_

_This can't be happening…this can't be real…_

_But what if it is? _

"Haru, if you just open your eyes now, I swear, I will never run away from you again. If you let me…I'll never leave you...I want you to stay with you…I want you to always be here!"

There was a loud, sharp sucking in of air and Kyo's heart leapt to his throat as he saw Haru's chest rise suddenly.

Kyo looked to his face and Haru's eyes flew open.

The world seemed to freeze as they looked into each other's eyes.

Haru broke the stillness by coughing madly and sharply sucking in more air.

"Haru!" Kyo exclaimed, his filled with relief. "Haru!"

_Haru, Haru! He's okay!_

"Haru…Haru!" Kyo couldn't seem to stop repeating the ox's name as moved even closer, and began to busily brush off the sand and dirt that still clung to Haru.

Haru blinked a few times. "You were worried about me…" he said, a hint of wonder in his voice. Then his familiar smirk spread over his face and he laughed, though a little shakily. "Good thing you came when you did, I had no idea which way was up or down or left or right…"

"Oh god…I'm so, so, sorry!" Kyo blurted out. "A-Are you okay now?" He peered at Haru closely, trying to work out how Haru could be sitting up, suddenly looking perfectly fine, as if nothing had happened. Kyo definitely couldn't get over it that easily. "I…I was so scared…I didn't know what to do!"

"I'm fine." Haru said seeming unfazed, though he was rather surprised over Kyo's obvious distress and concern for him. _He was really worried for me? Does this mean he realises he does care for me too?_

Kyo stopped brushing the dirt off Haru.

He stared at Haru.

Haru blinked at him.

"How can you be so calm in a situation like this!" Kyo shouted. "You could have died, you baka!"

Haru's answer was to pull Kyo into a tight hug, and he was pleased when the red-haired boy didn't try to pull away. He was still for a moment, but then Kyo squeezed him back even tighter.

"Ah…Kyo?" Haru looked down at Kyo pressing himself against him and started thinking that if Kyo didn't let go soon he couldn't be trusted to keep his hands to himself.

"Kyo…You're kinda making it difficult for me to breath…"

Kyo made a sound of alarm and released Haru. "Oh my gosh I'm sorry did I hurt – "

Haru was smiling.

_What's with this guy? _Kyo thought, starting to feel a little crazy. Everything was beginning to feel kinda fuzzy and dreamlike as if it weren't quite real…as if he wasn't quite here or there…_Haru, your kinda driving me insane…_

Every surrounding seemed to disappear as all of Kyo's focus zoomed in on Haru…all he knew was suddenly he was getting the strongest urge to…

_To kiss him! _

_I want to kiss him? That's okay right? If I just lean forward and…_

Kyo pushed Haru onto his back and kissed him long and hard.

_Tingles...running through my whole body…_

_Haru…why do you make me feel this way… _

_Your stealing my breath yet I don't want to stop - _

_Wait a sec – _

_What am I doing? _

"Ahh! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Kyo burst out when he abruptly broke away. "I didn't mean to…."

_Great one Kyo! What are you doing, trying to kill him? He's just been in a life threatening situation! He's probably still hurt! _

"Don't be." Haru managed, half laughing. "I'm fine…that actually wasn't the first time I've gotten trapped in a landslide. It really wasn't that bad, I would have figured a way out sooner or later! I just got a little dazed that's all! Nothing to worry about!" _Nothing at all…if only I had known sooner that all I had to do was get buried by a little sand and Kyo would willingly make-out with me! _

Kyo hesitated, not looking convinced.

But the ox was ecstatic. _Kyo__ made the first move! _His mind shouted in glee. There was nothing to stop Haru now. He yanked a stunned Kyo back against him then flipped them over so that he was on top before dipping his head to continue the kiss. He placed a hand lightly under Kyo's chin, in order to stop him from turning his head away, but he needn't have worried as Kyo just responded by kissing him back harder. Instinctively, his legs wrapped themselves around Haru's waist and barely aware of what he was doing Kyo pressed himself closer, wanting more and wanting to give more…

Kyo heard Haru moan in satisfaction and the knowledge that it was because of him made his heart beat faster.

_And the number one method of seduction is…?_Kyo thought in amusement, _A near death experience…_his thoughts trailed off as Haru began doing things to him that made him feel better than he could ever have imagined…

Surely something that felt so good couldn't be wrong? Why had he even _tried_ to resist…?

"Kyo…"

He liked hearing Haru moan his name as they kissed each other…it reminded him that Haru knew perfectly well who he was with…

_And he still wants to be with me like this…_

Hands began to wander, caressing soft skin and toned muscle…neither noticed nor cared as more and more grass and dirt covered their bodies as they rolled on the ground becoming more and more lost in each other.

Haru remembered all too clearly those feelings of guilt, shame, sadness and loneliness that he had experienced while sharing Kyo's emotions in his body…he wanted more than anything to take away those feelings. _Kyo is too important, too special to live his life like that! _He wanted to make Kyo always feel happy and he wanted to protect him from ever feeling anything less again…

Though he didn't know if he had that kind of power in him, he certainly wanted to try.

Meanwhile, Kyo found himself becoming amazed with the way Haru was responding to his touches. He had been shy before, exploring these feelings of desire, and the things that he wanted to do to Haru but hadn't wanted to admit…he was self conscious and cautious, because he couldn't really believe or understand that Haru could want to really do these things with him too. But there was no mistaking it now…when he kissed Haru there, he shivered, when he nipped him lightly there, the boy moaned, and when he rubbed himself against him right there…

Kyo smiled watching Haru's reactions. He liked how Haru was completely focused on him, on every move he made, on every touch. Haru watched him beneath hooded eyes with an intensity that made him shiver in excitement. At the same time he suddenly felt confident…he didn't have to worry about what Haru thought of him, because the way Haru was responding to even the slightest touch told him more than enough to ease any doubts…Kyo felt powerful…he never imagined he could make another person feel this way…and of all the people…he was glad it was Haru.

Grinning, Kyo rolled them over again so that he was on top. He pinned Haru's arms down when the other boy tried playfully to flip them back. Kyo fixed him with a heated stare that froze his efforts, then he started in surprise as the neko slid down his body, taking his pants with him.

"Ahh….Kyo what are you…you don't have to do – ahhhh!"

He fell back helpless against the ground as he felt his neko's warm mouth surround him.

Kyo had never done anything like this before (and never would have even considered it – though if he had he probably wouldn't have had a clue how to do it right) but he found that it wasn't hard to improvise, and Haru's responses told him just about anything he did was right.

He used his tongue and mouth to suck and lick, paying the most attention to the head of Haru's cock, sucking harder there, then loosening his mouth to slide down and take a little more in, then coming back up, tightening as he went all the while his hand worked around the base, squeezing him, stroking him. He came back up towards the head and gave a particularly precise lick at a certain spot that made Haru suck his breath in sharply.

"Ahhhh – Kyo….Where did you learn …?" Haru started, sounding suspicious of the neko's talent.

Kyo paused just for a second to grin up at him then continued what he had been doing.

Kyo supposed he should have been finding this disgusting…if anyone ever suggested it to him a few months ago…even a week ago, he would have called them a pervert and sworn he would never, ever do something so….

So amazing. With Haru, it felt right and it wasn't gross because it allowed Kyo to get closer to him, to explore these feelings with him, with Haru, a person who Kyo really really liked… Kyo liked the taste of him and the feel of his hard, warm member in his mouth…and he loved the way Haru was responding…he was beginning to find out there was nothing he _didn't _like about Haru…

Just listening to the little moans Haru was making, and his attempts to speak to encourage Kyo, but only managing to whisper his name between shaky breaths - was having its effect on Kyo too, he felt a fraction away from coming himself, simply seeing, hearing and being near Haru like this.

Kyo reached down, pressing his palm against his throbbing erection, wanting to relieve the pain that he was starting to feel….he wanted to give Haru pleasure but he wasn't sure how much longer he could continue this before he felt he would burst…

"S-stop…."

Kyo paused and looked up at Haru.

Haru's grey eyes met his, shinning with emotion. He breathed heavily for a few moments, trying to gain control of himself before he managed to say: "I want the first time to be… inside of you…"

Kyo swallowed then nodded, suddenly nervous again.

Haru wondered how he should go about this…he was nervous too, but he didn't want to show it for fear that it would make Kyo scared. He quickly removed the rest of their clothes and then placed two fingers in his mouth before drawing them out slowly, never taking his eyes off Kyo who was watching him with a mixture of desire, interest, confusion, and fear. Suddenly he felt Haru, pressing two fingers to his tight entrance.

Kyo immediately tensed up. _Oh god…oh god he wants to go in there…I don't think I…can…_

"Relax kitten," Haru soothed, and lowered his head to kiss a slow, soft trail up Kyo's chest. He licked and nipped lightly at the tender skin of Kyo's throat, listening to his breathing grow ragged as Kyo became distracted with what Haru's mouth was doing and relaxed once more.

Haru inserted two fingers into him.

"Ah!!" Kyo tensed up again, his face twisted at the sudden and unusual feeling. Haru waited, half afraid that Kyo would shove him away and say he would never let anything _bigger _enter him. Haru clenched his jaw in the effort not to just thrust himself into Kyo and pound him into the ground without stopping like his body screamed at him to do, but more important than his own pleasure was Kyo's and he didn't want to hurt him anymore than he could help.

"God….Haru…." Kyo's eyes had become unfocused. "More…" he thrust his hips upwards in invitation.

Haru grinned and positioned the head of his cock at Kyo's entrance, teasing him, but at the same time torturing himself.

"Are you ready Kyo?" he asked breathlessly, letting the other boy feel the size of him.

_Oh god…how is that going to fit…_Kyo pushed that thought aside as he felt a flash of annoyance. _What does he mean 'are you ready?' __Does he think I can't handle him? I'll show him! _

"Of course I'm ready! If you don't hurry up it's going to be over before it's even started…"

He was silenced as Haru entered him.

He gasped as the size of Haru stretched and filled him so that for a moment he almost felt as if he would split into two. _Oh man…I never expected it would feel this painful…_

Kyo blinked rapidly trying not to let his eyes tear; he didn't want Haru to see.

_Even if it's painful for me, it will still be worth it if Haru feels happiness…I'll pretend it doesn't hurt if I can just continue to see his face filled with such pleasure…_

But Haru had noticed and he was looking down at Kyo with the strangest mixture of bliss and concern on his face.

"I'm sorry kitten…does it hurt? If the pain is too much I'll pull out…"

_Does it hurt? How can it not hurt with something the size of…of that inside me…_

_But it's Haru…_

Kyo looked up at Haru and shook his head. "Don't stop Haru."

Haru smiled at Kyo tenderly and drew him closer in his arms as he began to gently move inside him. He could see that Kyo was in discomfort but that he was trying to pretend he wasn't…. _my Kyo is so determined and strong willed _he thought in adoration. _My Kyo? Yes…he is mine now. _

Haru felt his heart swell. _I have made you mine now…do you accept it?… _he thought, praying that Kyo felt the same way. After Kyo, he didn't want any other. _I can't believe I never realised how right we are for each other before… _

"You feel sooo good, Kyo." Haru whispered in his ear and continued to tell him just how he was making him feel as he felt Kyo shiver in response.

As soon as the red haired boy relaxed, he was hit by intense pleasure once more and any discomfort completely disappeared. He suddenly felt like Haru was going excruciatingly slow and he wondered if he was doing it on purpose…

Haru murmured continuous encouragements to him and Kyo wondered how he could speak when he himself was hardly managing to breath. Every stroke, every thrust of his hips sent spikes of pleasure thought his body, and every whispered word drove him more and more wild. He felt as if his body was burning up, and he just couldn't keep still, he had to go faster…it was too much…

Kyo opened his mouth trying to say the words.

He didn't need to, it was almost as if Haru could read his mind because he shifted positions slightly, and began to go faster, thrusting himself into Kyo deeper and harder. Haru reached down to wrap a hand around Kyo's member and stroked him in time with his thrusts.

Kyo cried out, unable to keep quite from the pleasure he was experiencing. His fingers dug into the ground beneath him, tearing up huge chunks. It was wild, out of control, and for a second Kyo almost feared that they would end up causing another landslide… But it felt so fantastic he could hardly care….

Kyo shouted out Haru's name as he came, and a second later Haru joined him. As they calmed down, Haru looked down at Kyo's flushed face and swollen lips, his eyes half closed in pleasure. Haru wanted to tell him how much he meant to him and that he realised Kyo meant, and had always meant more to him than just a way to find release. But he didn't know how to form the words, and he was afraid Kyo would get scared at too much happening too soon and leave him again. He rolled off Kyo reluctantly.

Kyo watched as his chest continued to rise and fall with his rapid breathing. He waited a few minutes, listening to Haru's own breathing and he suddenly couldn't stand the distance between them though it was only a small gap.

It was like ever since this had happened, Haru really had become a part of him, and now that Kyo had admitted it, he couldn't stand to be separated…

Haru gave a start as he felt the neko climbing onto him, straddling his waist. Kyo smiled in anticipation. "Haru, lets do that again."

------------------

It wasn't until quite some time later that the two boys finally wore each other out and gave in to sleep, holding each other close.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

"I told her I'm sure they are absolutely fine." Shigure commented to Yuki as they trudged through the woods.

"Well, it's been too many days, we need to go bring them back before Honda-san has a heart attack from the stress!"

Shigure and Yuki were out looking for Haru and Kyo after getting sick of watching Tohru do nothing but stare out the window and wonder out loud at regular intervals if "Kyo-kun and Hatsuharu-san were okay". "What if Haru got lost and Kyo went to search for him and then he got lost…"

Her theories were endless.

Shigure had only really decided to go search for them when Tohru had started forgetting to prepare the meals…and the thought of having Yuki's cooking for dinner one more time…

Shigure was sure that the boys were fine. "I'm sure we would have sensed it if anything were wrong."

Yuki shrugged. "That baka neko probably just ran off to sulk, but Haru really could be lost."

Shigure laughed.

"Why are you laughing?" Yuki asked, annoyed that Shigure had dragged him along.

"Because I know they are together."

"How?"

"I saw them, a few days ago. I saw them leaving the house early in the morning…_together_. Obviously with some purpose. Now heres a question…what would two, vigorous youths alone in the woods be doing to pass the time?"

Yuki shuddered a little. "Stop being such a pervert, not everyone is as sick minded as you, Shigure."

"They're close." Shigure murmured. "Ah! See!" He pointed through the trees to a clearing where Kyo and Haru lay in each other's arms, not wearing much of anything, sound asleep.

Yuki blanched. _I don't believe it…_

Seeing Shigure open his mouth as if about to shout something out to the boys (and Yuki didn't want to even imagine what) Yuki clamped his hand over Shigure's mouth and dragged him away. "I think we've seen more than enough." He said stiffly.

Shigure laugh was muffled beneath his hand. "What shall we tell Tohru?" he wondered out loud when Yuki released him.

Yuki just shook his head.

--------------------------

"Oh god."

"Kyo..?" Haru murmured sleepily at the sound of the horror filled voice. He cracked open one eye to see the neko sitting up and edging away slowly.

Haru gave him a blank look.

"I'm sorry Haru…last night…." Kyo didn't know what to say as a thousand chaotic thoughts crashed about in his mind._ He was buried alive…lack of air probably impaired his thinking for a while…he wasn't rational… oh god I can't bear to see his reaction! Is he totally disgusted? Does he regret this?_

Haru rolled his eyes a little seeing Kyo turn his back. There was no way after what had happened that he was going to let Kyo distance himself now.

Grabbing him by the shoulders Haru forced him to turn around.

Kyo met Haru's desire filled eyes that had turned almost black.

_I guess he doesn't regret it…_he thought dimly, as Haru pressed his lips to his in a forceful kiss.

Part of him had feared after Haru had achieved his goal, 'seduce Kyo' that everything would return back to how it was before. But, the other part of him had known that Haru wasn't like that. When he became serious about someone…he didn't play games.

Kyo sighed as he felt the warmth of Haru's kiss spread in tingles through his body right down to his toes and happiness filled him. It was still quite a foreign feeling.

He had expected things wouldn't feel so good this morning…when the harsh daylight snapped them out of the dreamlike state of night and made everything seem so real…he had thought that what had happened would turn into a hazy memory…a mistake - something never to be repeated. Something that, under normal circumstances was unthinkable…unnatural…

_But it wasn't really wrong_… 

Haru broke away but continued to kiss along Kyo's jaw line and then nuzzled at his neck lovingly. "Now that I have you Kyo…" he murmured huskily, "I'm never going to let you go."

"I….I don't want you to let me go, Haru." Kyo said, meaning it with everything he had as he remembered the words he had said to Haru the day before: _" I will never run away from you again. If you let me…I'll never leave you_..._I want you to always be there!"_

Kyo wasn't used to good things happening so he guessed that was why he was still a bit nervous. He looked down at black and white haired boy who had fallen asleep again, his arms wrapped so tightly around Kyo's waist that he could hardly move. Not that he minded.

It looked like the ox was here to stay.

---------------

Kyo awoke with a start as he felt something cold and wet submerging him and the sound of someone laughing wickedly.

He opened his eyes slowly to confirm what he had begun to suspect. That's right, somehow he was shoulder deep in the lake and Haru was in front of him, holding him in his arms.

Kyo glared at Haru as hard as he could. Surely this wasn't real…it was a dream, no a nightmare!

But the smile on Haru's face suggested anything but.

"Haru…….what is the meaning of this?" Kyo ground out.

"Um…you wouldn't wake up." Haru explained innocently. "So I thought, what better way than –."

"I'M SO GOING TO KICK YOU'RE ASS FOR THIS HARU!"

Haru only grinned wider as the neko splashed about in his arms. _How adorable_, he thought.

"You need to calm down kitten. I know you don't like water, but I'm here with you…I'm sure I can help you learn to like it."

"And just how do you think you can do that?"

Haru answered him with a deep kiss.

Kyo shivered, amazed that all Haru had to do was kiss him like that and he practically forgot everything else.

The water was icy-cold and the moment his body had touched it, his flesh had rose into goose bumps. Now however, feeling the warmth of Haru's lips against his, and the heat of his body pressing against his own shivering one…Kyo suddenly felt like he was on fire... and just like he had promised, Haru did teach Kyo how to appreciate water.

_--------------------_

"I don't want to go back." Kyo said as they lay, drying themselves in the sun.

Haru rolled over to his side, propping his head up with one hand. "We have to Kyo, we've already been away for too long, we can't stay here forever. We're running out of food and the others will be worried about us…"

"Be worried about _you, _you mean," Kyo said a little angrily, though he felt a little guilty. _Am I being selfish asking him to stay here with me?_

"I doubt anyone would care or be upset that I'm gone. They're probably celebrating each day of my absence."

Haru frowned. "That's not true. I know that there are members who treat you differently or judge you because you're the neko, but, those who know you better…even Yuki would be worried about you to some degree."

Kyo snorted loudly. "Now that's just going a bit too far, Haru."

"What about Tohru? She would be worried."

Kyo felt a slight stab of pain. Why was Haru saying these things? He turned over so that he had his back to Haru, not willing to let him see the pain in his eyes.

"I thought you understood, Haru." He said, his voice betraying how he felt.

"Hey…." Haru leaned over him so he could see his face. "I _do _understand Kyo. I know exactly how you feel."

When Kyo simply remained silent, Haru went on. "Well maybe I don't know _exactly _how you feel, I guess another person should never claim that, but, if I were you, and I have had experience being that," he laughed a little, "then I wouldn't want to go back because…Spending time out here in these woods has been an escape from reality. With just me and you…for the first time in ages, you wake up in the morning and the first thing you thought about wasn't if today would be the day you would finally defeat Yuki. If you would finally prove yourself worthy….the first day in ages you didn't have to see Tohru and feel like a worse person because of her kindness…

I guess you feel that these few days have been a lucky break and something that is too good to be true or last long so part of you is scared that by returning to your 'normal' life things will go back to the way they were before. You don't want that to happen because now that you have seen that you don't always have to feel that way you don't know if you are strong enough to face the pain again…"

Kyo stared with wide eyes up at Haru as he told him almost perfectly what Kyo was really thinking. But instead of feeling sad, he felt happiness seize him. _He understands! Haru really understand…and he doesn't think I'm pathetic or stupid, he really understands…_

"I never realised how you felt about these things, but I had hoped that now you would feel differently Kyo. That not everyone thinks of you in that way, and that there are people who will always respect and admire you." _And love you, _he added silently.

"And when we go back, things will _not _be the same, because, now that we've realised how we feel about each other, I'm going to stay by your side throughout it all and make sure you are happy."


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

Shigure Sohma's house loomed ahead of them.

Part of Kyo wanted to turn around and go dashing back into the woods. But he wasn't going to do that…especially after the speech Haru had given him…

Kyo turned to the ox and smiled, before walking with quick purposeful steps towards the door.

It burst open just as he neared it.

A blur of colour rushed at him and he felt two arms wrapped around him.

"Kyo-kun!"

In the next instance, an orange neko stood where Kyo had been.

"Gomen nasai!" Tohru apologised, frantically, "I was just so pleased to see you've returned Kyo! We missed you so much!"

Haru gave Kyo a 'I told you so' look.

"Ahh! So the two horny teenagers finally return from their romp in the woods!" Shigure grinned widely as they entered the house.

Kyo stiffened, his tail standing straight up, his back arching. "Shut up you baka!" he warned, however Shigure was not at all threatened by the small orange fur ball hissing at him.

"We'll I understand that you two may have wanted some privacy, especially seeing as the walls in this house are paper thin, not really appropriate for some loud night time activity, but don't you think you spent a little _too _much time away, I mean you two must have been _real _preoccupied! But then I guess it's never too long when you're young! Young and energetic and – "

Hissing, Kyo launched himself at Shigure. He was glad he wasn't in human form at that moment or his bright red face would have completely given away the fact that Shigure's words were quite an accurate description –

"Yep. Kyo and I had a lot of fun. I made him mine. Many times." Haru said as simply as if they were discussing the weather.

Kyo was absolutely flabbergasted. He had imagined that he would try to keep their relationship quite, so as to avoid as much possible teasing from Shigure and Ayame and whoever else he decided to tell and to avoid awkwardness…. Until it became too obvious…but to just blurt it out like that!

Yuki came down the stairs to see what all the fuss was about.

"Sorry Yuki." Haru said. "I only have eyes for Kyo now."

Now that was something Kyo didn't mind hearing Haru say out loud. Strangely, he suddenly felt like sticking out his tongue at the rat.

Yuki nodded as if uninterested. "Good for both of you."

Tohru, who was looking a little confused, also looked delighted. "Waaaah! How wonderful!" she exclaimed.

Shigure headed for the phone, no doubt to call Ayame or Hatori and tell them things Kyo didn't want to think about. But he couldn't bring himself to stay worked up or angry because truly, in that instance he suddenly knew things would be different. Better.

Seeing that Kyo would turn back into his human form any second (minus the clothes) Haru picked Kyo up and said "I'll take him to his room."

Yuki cringed slightly while Tohru continued to smile happily.

"And then," Shigure's voice floated from the other room, "he said they did it again and again…do you remember when we used to be that energetic? Ah good times, right Ayame?"

---------------------------

_A few weeks later._

Kyo smiled as he opened his eyes and watched the sunlight streaming through his window. He thought of Haru, as thoughts of Haru were the first things that crossed his mind every morning, and felt nothing but happiness.

It was hard to believe that not so long ago he would wake up and not want to get out of bed. But these days, he was even glad to go to school because that meant he would get to see Haru.

Kyo couldn't figure out exactly why simply seeing Haru made him feel so happy, made his heart swell and his blood rush a little faster, made him unable to stop the corners of his mouth turning up at the sight of the one he loved…

Love. It still sounded so foreign to him even when he thought it. But what else could explain this happiness and peace that had transformed his life?

To the casual onlooker, Kyo and Haru's lives may not have seemed to change much. They still went to school, stayed in their own homes, went to their classes, ate and slept as normal. Kyo still argued frequently with Yuki (though they did seem to be fighting a little less), Black Haru still emerged every now and then and even Kyo and Haru argued like they had used to.

But, someone who knew them would notice that even when they argued, even when they insulted each other they had a light in their eyes when they looked at each other that hadn't been there before. Someone who had always spent time around them would also notice the subtle and not so subtle looks the two boys would frequently give each other when they were together and the way they _always _seemed to be near each other these days…

But, even though on the surface life was not that different, for Kyo at least, he felt as if his whole life had changed. He never would have guessed that just finding someone who understood him could change things so completely…but maybe it would never have been just someone.

_Haru…I'm so lucky to have you_. Kyo thought, as he thought everyday.

That night as he laid his head against his pillow he thought back to that mysterious girl who had made this all possible. Truly, he owed her a lot for what had happened, even if it wasn't intentional, but he still felt that he needed to thank her….part of him felt anxious to make his gratification be known because part of him was scared if he didn't Haru might be taken away from him…yes part of him felt that something so good couldn't last.

But then every day, Haru was there, smiling at him, making him laugh…taking away all his worries and pain…giving him a reason to live…making him feel like it really could stay like this forever. He really wished he could go back and thank her…whoever she really was…whatever she really was.

_Thank you so much…_he sent the thought out to the mysterious girl before he closed his eyes and fell asleep.

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"Kyo."

_He looked up at the sound of the soft feminine whisper and smiled when he saw the mountain_, that_ mountain in front of him. _

_He looked up further to where he knew the cave would be, to where he knew that mysterious girl made her home where there was a pool of sparkling, magical liquid… _

_Somehow he only needed to think of it, and in the next instance he found himself there, standing inside the cave. _

_The girl was there too, hovering slightly over her pool, smiling at him. _

_Everything seemed to shimmer a silvery blue. _

"_I heard you call out to me, Kyo." She said. "And so I have brought you visit me in this dream." _

"_Huh?" was all Kyo could manage to say. _

"_This is a dream, but it is also real. I'm a woman of many talents." She laughed her musical laugh. _

_Kyo looked perplexed but then shrugged and smiled. "I just wanted to thank you. I realise I may have been a little rude to you last time we met, but in truth, you've enriched my life more than I can possibly express…to put it simply…now I feel like I actually have something to live for. Thank you." _

_Her smile grew wider. "What a charming young man you are! You are most certainly welcome!"_

_Kyo beamed feeling relieved that he had a chance to thank her though he wasn't sure if that deserved him being called 'a charming young man'. _

_The girl surprised him when she suddenly continued on, "Now, pleasantries aside, we both know why you really can't stop thinking of coming back to see me. You realise my offer to you to make a wish still stands. I have the power to grant anyone who sees me the wish of their dreams if they will only let me borrow their bodies for three days and three nights. I'm sure there's something more your heart desires?" _

_Kyo frowned slightly. "No…you are mistaken, I did not have that intention in mind." _

"_But surely…" _

"_Now that I have Haru there is nothing else I could possibly ever wish for." _

"_Well, would your boyfriend like to come here and make a wish of his own then?" she asked pleasantly, sending a strange chill down Kyo's spine. He started to get the feeling that, even if this was occurring inside his own dream, he should leave. _

"_No." he said, shaking his head with meaning. "I was lucky this time, but I don't like to push my luck. While magic may often be a good thing, it also brings with it too much power… it shouldn't be something that is used in greed. I'm very thankful for your help but I know too well that magic can also bring curses along with it. Sorry if it sounds like I'm judging you, there are lots of things I don't know about you or what you could do, but frankly I don't want to find out." _

_Kyo hated the way he was sounding. He didn't want to offend her when he had come here to thank her! But the sudden feeling that had crept up his spine was rapidly growing worse and worse. He felt like his blood was turning cold and it was disturbing him. He tried to shrug it off but it was becoming almost painful…_

"_So," he said, trying to maintain a pleasant tone but unable to help his next words suddenly becoming clipped, "Thank you, and this will be the last time we see each other. Good bye." _

_He turned and walked from her cave. _

The girl peered into her pool of sparkling liquid and watched Kyo as he lay in his bed sleeping, his mind drifting off to other thoughts, to pleasant dreams concerning a certain black and white haired boy….

Her lips were still curved up in a smile, but this time, it was slightly sinister as she remembered his words. _"So this is goodbye." _

"Or is it really Kyo?" she said out loud and then laughed, her once light musical voice turning ice cold. "I don't think so."

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The end. )

_Well who knows, maybe the girl is wrong and has underestimated the compleate happiness Kyo and Haru have found together...maybe they will live happily forever after!_

_But maybe…_

_Well I wanted to leave it open because I actually have an outline for a sequal that I may or may not write in the future! It will probably be called_

_' Incomplete'. So look out for that one if you liked this story :) than you for reading!_


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